h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

You'd nearly get the impression, reading this, that Conan was a good film.

Well, James Earl Jones is good in it, if a bit robotic ...

I still think the line "Contemplate this on the tree of woe" is his greatest quote ever - much better than "I am your father" or "Everything the light touches is our kingdom" imho

I only subbed it! never saw the film myself, in fact I thought it was good, and I usually only like films that are in french and only shown at one venue.

Time for me to say "eh?".

You never saw the film, but you thought it was good? Weird. I've never thought a film was good without seeing it ...

~

Well what I meant was.. whilst I was subbing the entry, I came to the conculsion that this was a good film that I'd like to see one day.

Heh. It's quite good fun - despite Arnold Schwarzenegger being a complete Pinocchio all the way through.

James Earl Jones is very sinister, but one can't help feeling that his magical powers would come in very handy in a lot of situations

I did like "The Highlander" is it anything like that?

As Sword and Sorcery epics go, Conan the Barbarian is the absolute bee's knees. Compare and contrast - if you will - Conan the Barbarian and Conan the Destroyer.

Actually, since I'm a great humanitarian, I'll say this: Don't. Don't ever see Conan the Destroyer, however little else there is to do and however good an idea it seems at the time.

But Barbarian is streets above the likes of not only Destroyer, but Red Sonja, Hawk the Slayer, Wizards of the Lost Kingdom, and just about any other film ever made in which a muscle-bounded plank in a loincloth waves a sword at a babbling would-be-philosopher.

Amen to that.

You guys are completely neglecting the "Beastmaster" films. Those were so bad they came back around and revealed a new basement for fantasy films. Conan is high art compared to that.

Are the Beastmaster films based on the Beastmaster books by André Norton? They were science fiction for 13-year olds.

Yes, I belive they are, and if you remember those books, you might remember the Gor series. Another classic post-pubescent book series. Reminds me of a time long ago, I still have a bunch of paperbacks tucked away in my garage somewhere.

I must stand up for Hawk the Slayer as it isn't about some muscle bound plank waving a sword at a babbling would be philosipher! Its about a battle between two brothers! It's a classic good versus eviland the only muscle bound bloke is the guy who plays the giant, that is only a foot taller than anyone else in the film. If you like fantasy films you'll love Hawk the Slayer!

Two words for you: Jack Palance!