Chapter 26: Job Opportunity

Librarian!

Robyn assured me that this would be the ideal job to aspire to for me, given my choice of exam subjects. Maybe I would need to get some specific tuition in martial arts, if that wasn't included in the curriculum.

My first question was how she had come to this insight.

Apparently, the void she had entered after finding out she graduated outright had eventually led her to claim the living room couch to binge-watch anything that came along her timeline. One of the random snippets of video showcasing a Librarian-based fantasy adventure franchise had piqued her interest.

After looking into the shared videos (for the time neglecting my History exam revisions) I admitted that this looked promising, although I have some doubts as to whether those movies reflect the reality of being a Librarian. This calls for some extra research. I'll go and visit the local Library after lunch. I must have a pass somewhere that enables me to borrow books, giving me a valid reason to go there in the first place. Now I just have to go and find it.

After searching for over an hour, Robyn decided to 'help' me by pointing out that it was probably hiding in 'the kitchen drawer of holding'. You know, the one that is used to store spare keys, obsolete chargers and cables, a mixture of empty and new batteries, old membership cards, small spare parts to equipment long gone, some clothes pegs, single shoelaces, an old digital quartz watch that Dad probably won at the funfair gripper machines before I was born and right at the back, under a knot of flower binding wire, my library card.

I wonder if it hasn't expired by now. I know I am not paying for it.

An red/silver haired elderly lady with half moon spectacles on the tip of her rather large nose was sitting behind a desk, filing cards. It was only marginally too small to be rated as 'fortress' (the desk, not the nose)

'I think I want to become a Librarian,' I declared in a loud whisper, after various attempts at coughing only led to looks of intense disapproval. Setting aside the box of cards, the Librarian pulled open a creaking and groaning drawer of the desk/fortress, wordlessly handing me an ancient-looking questionnaire and a well-chewed HB pencil. She then pointed to a small Brutalist desk and chair, before returning to her card filing. I decided not to comment on the large, well-used and red stained dagger that was also appeared to be in the drawer.

Sitting down on the chair, I concluded that Brutalism didn't agree with my anatomy, so I looked at the questionnaire to see if I could get this done before my tailbone would relocate to somewhere higher up my spine.

This is what it looked like:

Current Name:

Preferred Nickname: (Choose wisely!)

Species:

Alignment: Good/Neutral/Evil .... Lawful/Neutral/Chaotic.^*

•How does the legacy of Miriam Braverman influence your day-to-day life?'

-

-

•Sort the last four books you read by increasing number of pages.
-1
-2
-3
-4

•Pineapple or anchovies?^*

•Who really killed JFK?

-

•Glory or Paycheck?^*

•List your memberships of any (other) secret organisations in alphabetical order.

-

-

-

-

•Can you operate the following technological devices:
-Stencil Machine Y/N^*
-Microfiche readerY/N^*
-Steam-powered typewriter or comparable equipment Y/N^*

•When can you start?

^*(cross out what does not apply)

Well, that doesn't look too hard... I do wonder whether my pizza preferences are relevant for Librarianship in general or if it is more of a thing specific to this Library. The question about (other) secret organisations gave me the idea that there might be more to the job than card filing after all. Maybe that movie / series franchise was on to something? I tried to mask my ignorance at the Braverman question (The name did ring a bell, but I am pretty sure they didn't mean the former Interior Minister) by stating she has been the sole reason for wanting to become a full Librarian myself (while at the same time vowing to look her up as soon as possible). The name did ring a bell, but I am pretty sure they didn't mean the former Interior Minister.

After considerable pondering on the nickname, I stood up and solemnly walked over to the Librarian to hand in the questionnaire.

She just gave it a brief glance, opened another drawer to extract a huge stamp, which she applied to my paperwork with considerable force, leaving a complex sigil surrounded by several lines of text in different scripts.

'Welcome to the Cult, Sparrowhawk!' she whispered while vigorously shaking my hand, glancing both ways to ensure nobody overheard the conversation. 'You start off as a Novice Librarian at zero payment but with a pizza allowance.' She winked, grabbed some grubby banknotes from another drawer and said 'Your first task is to get us some food.(wink) Mine with pineapple and double anchovies, go easy on the mustard. And bring some teabags, while you're at it. You can call me Unicorn. (I know, it was a long time ago.)'

And thus my future was decided (it appears).

I'll have to see if I can do the revision for History tonight. But first... Let there be pizza... Heigh-Ho!!!

Caiman Raptor Elk

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