'Tell me again,' said Hani, 'Why you had an irresistible urge to go roaming around on foot in this desert at night?'

'It's where I do my best thinking,' said Ori honestly. It was true: Ori did get a lot of good thinking done walking (or flying) around at night. Sleeping humans left Ori with more free mental space. It wasn't the whole truth, though: Ori didn't want to tell Hani that Prajapati had suggested the after-dark perambulation. And had warned of an upcoming bit of weirdness. Ah, there it was...

The air around them shimmered. The landscape and skyscape before them fractionated into thin, translucent layers, like shards of crystal. For a moment, the two angels could see the planet shaved into slivers of spacetime: tiny moments in the continuum. The effect lasted only a split second: only an angel could have perceived it. And Prajapati, probably, thought Ori, who suspected the source of the disturbance.

The two hikers stayed put until the timeslip had completed itself. One slice of crystal glowed brighter and the others disappeared. A new spacetime had asserted itself. Hani and Ori looked at one another and shrugged. They walked on.

'Now, what was that all about?' wondered Hani. Ori just laughed.

'Me-eh-eh! Me-eh-eh!'

'What in the world...?' said Hani. 'Somebody must really not be impressed by this landscape.'

'Oh, don't be silly,' said Ori and pointed. Coming over the horizon was a curious sight: a fair-sized herd of goats – nannies, billies, and leaping kids. The mehing might have been a complaint about the lack of interesting edibles along the road – but was more likely caused by the humans chivvying them along. After dark, no less. Obviously, the goats felt it was past both their dinnertime and their bedtime, and were telling the men about it.

'Stay incognito,' whispered Ori. 'We don't want to start any more cults.' Hani nodded as they approached the goat herders with a peaceful greeting and stretched-out arms. After dark, it was advisable to let people know you weren't packing while you were still out of reach.

'Peace be upon you!' called Ori. 'Whither go ye so late, brothers?' I've really been hanging around Mesopotamians too long, Ori thought. I've caught the rhetoric bug. Hani suppressed a giggle, but the greeting appeared to reassure the lead herdsman.

'And peace to you,' replied the herdsman. 'Come ye from Esaf? We are emissaries from his brother.'

Without thinking, Ori exclaimed in surprise, 'You're with Ya'akov? He's done well for himself.'

'Indeed,' replied the herdsman. 'In the twenty years since he left the land of his fathers, Ya'akov has truly prospered in the house of his father-in-law. He has four wives.'

'That's three too many,' muttered Hani. Ori poked Hani in the ribs while looking attentive and respectful.

'Don't criticise!' Ori hissed. 'And never interrupt an emissary when he's speaking. We'll be here all night.'

Fortunately for them, the emissary was nervous and didn't notice the whispering. Goat herders weren't often chosen as messengers and this long speech was doing his head in. He cleared his throat and started again, 'Lo, Ya'akov sends greetings to his brother Esaf. He has heard that his brother cometh out with four hundred horsemen. This doeth...er, doth Ya'akov great honour, indeed.'

And scareth the living daylights out of him, thought Ori.

Hani, overhearing, suppressed a chuckle. So that's the way the wind a-bloweth, is it?

Aloud, and to speed things along, Hani said, 'Nice herd of goats you got there, friend.'

'They're for Esaf!' said the herder, totally forgetting all the highfalutin' speech he'd memorised. 'It's part of the present. So Esaf won't attack.'

Ori thought. 'I'm pretty sure Esaf's intentions are peaceable, in spite of the entourage. Tell you what: I'm more worried about you folks wandering about in the dark. The moon's rising...' as, indeed, it was, conveniently, 'but even still, a man or a goat might stumble into a hamster hole.'

The herder nodded solemnly. 'You've got a point. Hamsters are a menace.'

'Why don't y'all pitch camp for the night?' suggested Hani. 'Looks like some decent fodder for goats around here, you can set up a campfire and rest, and y'all can see anything comin' from miles away in this moonlight. I certainly wouldn't want to be stumblin' around at night with about...' he guesstimated, 'two hunnerd goats to keep track of.'

'220,' replied the herdsman. 'I have the pebble bag here.' He patted his pouch, which contained 220 pebbles – goats, for the counting of. 'Thank you, gentlemen. 'You're right, it's a good idea for us and the goats to rest. Thank you for giving us permission.'

Ori and Hani didn't bother telling the herdsman that they had no authority to give them permission to park goats – they also figured nobody would care. The herdsmen and the goats would be more comfortable encamped for the night – and Ori had taken a quick look at the book and knew the goat herders need not fear Esaf's home cavalry. They bade the herders and the goats a pleasant night and went on their way.

The yellow moon, nearly full, shed a bright light across the landscape. This early in the evening, shadows were tall: shrubs looked like trees. Hani was briefly spooked by a hare. That made Hani laugh and sing.

Oh, John the Rabbit, yes, ma'am

Got a mighty habit, yes, ma'am

Jumpin' in my garden, yes, ma'am

Cuttin' down my cabbage, yes, ma'am

My peas and greens, yes, ma'am

My lentils and beans, yes, ma'am

And if I live, yes, ma'am

To see next fall, yes, ma'am

I ain't gonna have, yes, ma'am

No garden at all, no, ma'am!

'No potatoes or tomatoes?' asked Ori drily.

'Not unless you're expectin' a ship from Peru to sail over the horizon there?' replied Hani.

Ori looked at the horizon and realised with a start that Hani's song had covered another sound. It sounded something like 'Baa, baa, baa...'

'That's either a shrivel of music critics or a flock of sheep,' remarked Hani.

It wasn't music critics. The sheep flowed over the hill, pouring down the sandy road like a really long flokati. The moonlight, more silver than gold now that the orb had risen, made the sheep look cleaner than they probably were. Ori called to the lead shepherd, alerting him to their presence and expressing good will – also suggesting that his colleagues the goatherds had found a good camping place a couple of miles down the road and would probably welcome the company. The shepherds thought this was a fine idea, 'And besides, these sheep are a gift from Ya'akov to his brother Esaf, like the goats. Maybe we should bring them all together.'

'Sure,' said Hani. 'What's another couple of hundred ruminants, more or less?'

'220,' corrected the shepherd, and patted his heavy sack of pebbles. Ori and Hani nodded understanding, and wished sheep and herdsmen a good night.

'Is this some kind of family feud we're walking into the middle of?' Hani asked Ori.

'Oh!' said Ori. 'I forgot: you didn't hear all that when you came down the Staircase. You remember that guy with his foot in the door?'

'Do I ever!' laughed Hani. 'I thought Ophaniel was going to sweat a comet. What was that all about?'

And Ori told the story as they walked the now-deserted road. It made a pleasant tale, there in the silver moonlight, Ori explaining, Hani laughing and exclaiming in surprise. It occurred to Ori how nice it was to have a friend who actually got all your jokes. In fact, if the Penthouse had contained this much companionship and fewer vocal exercises Ori might not have left.

As the two crested another low hill, their ears were assaulted by an outrageous amount of noise.

'That,' said Hani, 'Completes my sonic education. I've always wondered what the opposite of music sounded like' To call what greeted their ears 'bellowing' didn't quite do it justice.

It sounded like a herd of beasts with very bad, very vociferous stomach aches.

It was, in fact, a herd of camels. Thirty of them, all with calves.

'These are milk camels,' explained the chief herdsman. Ori could feel Hani beside him, shaking with silent, uncontrollable laughter. Ori poked Hani in the side, hard, causing Hani to let out a sound not entirely unlike that of the camels.

The lead camel herdsman looked at Hani quizzically. 'Are you all right, sir?' he asked.

'Must've been something I et,' said Hani with a straight face.

The camels and babies were already bedded down for the night. The camel herders didn't want to catch up with the shepherds and goatherds. ('They fight,' they said, meaning the livestock and not the herdsmen.) They invited the strangers to stop with them for the rest of the night, but Ori demurred, saying that they were travelling by night in order to avoid the heat of the day. Privately, Ori was afraid Hani would get into a bellowing contest with the camels – or worse, one of the camels would fall in love with Hani. A lovesick camel would be a serious complication. So they bade farewell to the camels and their humans and rambled on.

Ori had just finished telling Hani the story of the Birthright business when they met up with an encampment of 40 cows and a lesser number of humans. A 'hill and a holler' later (according to Hani), they found 20 bulls and their keepers. The bulls were sleepy, and so were the humans. Ori and Hani called out, 'For Esaf?' The herdsmen waved assent, and they went on.

Hani laughed. 'Ya'akov is really scairt of that brother of his. Amazing that he did what he did all those years ago.'

'His fear has probably grown over time. Also, twenty years ago, Ya'akov was just a kid with nothing to lose. Now look at him: if these herds are a gift he's doing really well in material terms. He must also have something he's willing to pay to protect.'

'Humans and property,' mused Hani. 'They do worry about it. And fight over it.' Ori nodded.

Finally, they rounded a hill and came upon a brook, quietly burbling through a greener landscape. There were even some trees, under which a group of people were settling down for the night. They had a few donkeys, but no livestock. Some children were snuggled into blankets by a banked campfire while a woman sang softly to them. It was a peaceful sight – but not for long.

Two armed men jumped up and stood between the strangers and the families. 'What do you want?' they demanded.

Ori and Hani held up placating hands. 'We are only travellers, passing through,' said Ori. 'We wanted to tell you that we'd met your herdsmen as we journeyed, and all is well with them.'

The men relaxed, slightly. 'You're not from Esaf?' the leader asked. Headshakes from Ori and Hani reassured him.

'We'd like to speak to Ya'akov, though,' said Ori. 'Where may we find him?'

The other guard pointed across the brook. 'Back there,' he said. 'He's spending the night alone. In meditation, he said. He'll join us in the morning.' Ori and Hani nodded and left, bowing in the direction of the family groups.

As they followed the road toward the little bridge that crossed the brook, Hani asked, 'What do you think he's 'meditating' about?'

'What he's going to say to Esaf after twenty years,' replied Ori.

'He'd better make it good,' said Hani.

On the other side of the brook, the road rose sharply again. As they neared the top, Hani took a deep breath of the night air and looked around at the landscape, so bright in the moonlight. A look back reassured them that the encampment by the brook was hidden from view by the trees.

'I'm tired of walking,' Hani announced. 'The brook's too small for swimming. I'm going to have a flyover, get a better view.' And the angel spread wings. Ori followed suit and they flew over the crest of the hill. The vista was impressive...

...and so was the bright light streaming down from the sky. From the open portal that shone onto the large, flat rock.

The large, flat rock on which a lone figure was sitting. Ya'akov, they assumed.

'Oh, lord, he's gone and opened the portal again,' said Hani. 'Ophaniel's going to have a cow.'

Ori didn't know whether to laugh or curse. 'I should have guessed it! The offkey buzzard wants insurance!'

Dmitri Gheorgheni

24.07.23 Front Page

Back Issue Page