Oh, to be in South Africa, right about now. Or Australia. Anywhere it isn't snowing.

Brr. It's cold at the Poles. See how much you knew about them.

1. This Pole has a natural annual melting cycle. North. Which is why climate scientists are way more worried about losing bits of Antarctica.
2. The hole in the ozone layer (as big as the continental United States) sits over this Pole. South. Don't sunbathe there.
3. Which Pole is colder? South. The average winter temperature there is -49C, compared to a balmy -34C at the North Pole and a paltry -20C in the Editor's backyard last night.
4. This Pole has penguins, but no polar bears, which is why penguins don't need to be able to fly. South.   Do not get your natural history from cartoons, Bluebottle.
5. This Pole has about half of the planet's remaining oil supply. North. Why do you think all those countries are messing about up there? They aren't looking for beachfront property.
6. This Polar region has the greater number of human inhabitants. North. Nobody owns Antarctica, no matter how many flags they plant. And you don't stay there unless you've got a science project to work on. Or you're really nutty.
7. Which Pole has more ice – in fact, 90% of the world's ice? South. Saudi Arabia once considered an idea about cutting a fair-sized ice cube and floating it home, but so far, nobody's tried it.
8. Which Pole is actually part of an ocean? North. Antarctica is a continent: it has rocks and stuffz.
9. Which Pole has the stronger polar vortex (tropospheric cyclone)? South. Large land masses in the North influence the vortex more than the surrounding oceans in the South.
10. It is a well-known fact – or it should be – that the magnetic poles are moving. What is less well-known is that they aren't moving at the same rate. Which geographic Pole has the slower-moving magnetic pole in its neighbourhood? South. It's only moving at 10-15 km per year, compared to 55-60 km for the one near the North Pole. Fun Fact to Annoy People With: the magnetic pole in the North is actually the south magnetic pole. And vice versa. Tell people this in a pub. We dare you.

This quiz probably didn't make you feel any warmer. But at least it reminded you to be glad you don't live at one of the Poles. Unless, of course, you do. In which case, we apologise.

Dmitri Gheorgheni

15.01.18 Front Page

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