Get your X-Files credentials here. Just print out this answer sheet and sign it, 'Adam Weishaupt'.

We don't want to alarm you, but actor David Duchovny recently stated on national TV that he hated it when aliens abducted him to complain about inaccuracies in The X-Files. Xbert says he didn't do it, and we're almost sure Duchovny was kidding.

What kind of conspiracy nuts are you? Here are the answers.

1. People who demand proof of citizenship from US political candidates are called birthers.
2. Those clamouring for more information on the events of 11 September 2001 are termed truthers.
3. The Moon Landing Hoax involves accusing NASA (and maybe Stanley Kubrick) of making a science fiction movie in 1969. The original Moon Hoax involved Bat People and was staged by the New York Sun.
4. The first gothic novel published in the US was in 1800. It concerned a shadowy group of movers and shakers called the Illuminati, and they're still around to bother us. Or so rumour has it.
5. Are you up for a chymical wedding? Followers of the possibly mythical Christian Rosenkreuz call themselves Rosicrucians.
6. If you're not happy with the official story about 22 November 1963, you might be really interested in what happened on the Grassy Knoll.
7. The Great Seal of the United States (from 1776) is the subject of a conspiracy theory. Why? Its reverse side bears the words novus ordo seclorum, which conspiracy buffs take to be a reference to the much-hated New World Order.
8. If you believe the Phoebus Cartel is keeping you in the dark, you subscribe to the Light Bulb Conspiracy.
9. Do you believe that government agents are secretly using time travel? (Pick me up some antiques.) Then you probably know all about the Montauk Project.
10. Are you afraid that digital television is being used for mind control? Then you should probably make yourself a tinfoil hat.

For the record, we don't believe the government can read our thoughts while we're using the computer. It's unnecessary, anyway. Everything we think, we write about in the h2g2 Post or the Edited Guide. See? Saving MI6 the trouble of spying since 1999.

Dmitri Gheorgheni

01.08.16 Front Page

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