h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

I have only just found this article and its so good! Its also nice to write down what is happening in my life at the moment having read some other conversations on this subject.

I am slap bang in the middle of a affair, that i'm pretty sure is breaking my heart. The biggest problem is that i hadn't read you great advice and I've gone and fallen in love with him. What makes it worse is that he says he loves me too. And I know he's a liar because he must lie his ass off to spend time with me, so i don't know why i believe him.

Last Christmas, he came with me to my works party. At the time he was living away, so the chances of anyone knowing him or his other half were remote. We had a lovely time. The problem, everyone at work thinks we're a couple. Now i have regular, how are you guys doing, going on holiday this year questions. Finally I've decided the only way to deal with that is to say that we're not seeing each other anymore. Simple.

If only the rest of it was so simple. When it started I thought it was easy, I could handle it, emotion didn't have any place. We saw eachother about once a week and it was fantastic. The sex is amazing. In fact I'd say it's the best I've had.

I don't know when we started to feel emotional, we didn't really discuss it. Then all of a sudden I realised I felt different. I actually cared about him and what was going on in his life. Having read your very accurate article I can see that this is when I should have got out.

Even now, he has a big thing about me not cheating on him. Which is starting to wind me up. I don't want to be with anyone else, but why should he feel he has exclusive rights to me. He's with someone else.

I feel regularly now, that i really must walk away from this. But I can't make myself do it. Although most of the time these days, i feel sad more than I feel happy. So, why am I doing this to myself ?

I've never really thought of myself as a mistress, denial I suppose. And i always thought mistresses didn't get hurt. But you really really do have to keep your emotions out of it.

My advice. Know what you're getting yourself into and make rules. If YOU can't stick to them, leave before you're in over your head. If he starts to get 'touchy feely' walk away.

I would say being a true mistress is about fun and stealing away to be with eachother, great sex and NO STRINGS ATTACHED.

The affair is over. It didn't break my heart! In fact I was far more detached than I thought. As my first 'mistress' experience, I can say that what I thought was love on my part was simply an illusion. I didn't love him and I feel free now it's over. A sure sign I should have got out sooner, a mistake I will not repeat in the future.

I am a "new" mistress and love it! I am married but bored.On the other hand I don't want a divorce.My boy friend is also married but we both find great excitement in our situation; the sex is fabulous and the flirting etc very exciting. I am in my 50s and he is 6 years younger than me and I have never felt so sexy or so desirable. However I am not blind to the realities of the situation and totally agree with the advice given in the article.I know that my situation will not last for ever and that nothing more can come of it- we both lie and cheat so how can that be the basis for a successful relationship? Thank you for putting it all down in words!