A Conversation for How to Be a Perfect Mistress

On Being a Mistress

Post 1

vanessamattie

I hope this question is in the right place.

I have found your article (dated 2003) on being a Mistress very useful.

There is one question. How do you get the man to buy presents and keep taking you out to dinner? I asked for flowers and got them the other week but am nervous to ask for more. I know he is financially pressured at the moment. I don't want to feel undervalued - an old pattern - and want to learn how to ask for what I need. I would love your advice. The rest of the article has been invaluable.

Vanessamattie


On Being a Mistress

Post 2

Mrs Zen

Oh I don't know Vanessa. *scratches head* The sum total of my gifts received is half a dozen books and a hunting knife. Oh, and a rather sad bunch of carnations. We shared all other costs more or less equally. But then I was in it beacuse I wanted commitment-free sex.

I think my advice on being a mistress if you are emotionally vulnerable and needy is "don't do it". Get yourself a boyfriend who is yours alone.

The more vulnerable you are, the more he'll hurt you. Being a mistress is for women who really really do not want commitment, and who have interesting and busy lives, but like having a friendly and regular fxxx

Good luck, sister.

B


On Being a Mistress

Post 3

vanessamattie

Thankyou for your quick reply. I thought you said that you were taken out for dinners etc. Just thought it would be nice to be bought some presents occasionally too - (my preconception about mistresses and whether I was doing something wrong). So are you saying that it's safer to share all expenses? I think a dinner occasionally is acceptable. But I agree that it is probably best to have no expectations whatsoever-from the outset. Will have a think about this i.e my needs. A boyfriend showing up would be preferable but in the meantime it is great to have some sex again.

Thanks,


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