A series of pictures and factoids for Create's NaJoPoMo Challenge.

You know that smelly stuff called Cologne? It's named after this city. Actually, the first cologne was 5711. And thereby hangs a tale.

It seems that back in the day, they started numbering the houses, so the delivery people could find them. Unfortunately, they didn't have a lot of experience in this house-number business. So they numbered them in the order they were built.

Way to go, guys.

Cologne's a funny old city. Lots of fascinating stuff around every crooked corner. Like the Roman villa. Next door to the cathedral, they found a mosaic floor. Decided to build the museum on top of it, rather than move it.

Then there's the Jewish quarter. It had a mkvah, that's a ritual bath. It's under a parking lot now. Get the key from the curator.

When they dug under a row of houses beside the Rhine, they found a lot of old cellars. Turns out that row of houses used to be workshops – for making tourist kitsch. In the Middle Ages. Cologne was a big pilgrim spot. The tourist tchotchkes were small statues of saints. The samples ended up in the local museum.

I took my students over there one day. Nice young ladies. The museum guard was a sly old geezer. He enjoyed telling them why St Lawrence had a gridiron, and what it was that Barbara had on her platter. He liked to hear visitors sqeaul.

Repairs to the U-Bahn were fraught. Basically, it was a matter of two days' digging, followed by two months of archaeologists underfoot. What a lovely place.

Tourists don't get it. They get off the bus, run through the Cathedral, grab a beer, get back in the bus. They don't see the place. Two thousand years of people doing what they do. I used to threaten to write a TV series called 'Cologne', all about the businesswomen there in the 13th Century. Had their own guild, and everything. It would have made 'Dallas' look shabby.

If you're in the neighbourhood, stop and buy some 4711.