PSA from the Golgotha College Director of Student Health and Hygiene.
Created | Updated Dec 23, 2003
Irritating Public Radio, Your Friends In The Air, Resent:
AN PUBLIC SURFACE ANNOUNCEMENT
FROM:
The Golgotha College Director of Student Health and Hygiene:
Dr. Tiny Terwilliger, M.D., Ph.D., UB40
SFX: 42 sec of Benjamin Britten's "Requiem for a missed taxi"
Good Evening. It is my very great pleasure to speak to you. Through the medium that I am using.
I have thought long about my topic tonight and hardly know where to begin. I know my comments should be brief and to the point. I shall try to make them so.
As I reflect back on my years as a student, I am stunned by all that I was not aware of, concentrating, as I had been, on my studies....
ANNOUNCER:
We interrrrupt this broadcast to inform you of an prevailing weather condition that might cause simultaneous and longterm distress for millions of registered dole queuers...
...my studies... Hello, I was speaking. This is a recording session! Why are you breaking in? Shouldn't you be interrupting a currently outgoing programme?
ANNOUNCER: Not really. It is a slow-moving front and we predict it will be here about Thursday.
But... This is going out on Wednesday, 9 A.M. East Winstead time!
ANNOUNCER: Then they will have plenty of notice and we shall have done our job!
Do you have any idea at all who I am? This is a very important PSA, designed to relieve the consciences and the medicinal cabinets of many an anxious modern student. I have worked long and hard on this piece and I mean to speak...ANNOUNCER: This just in... a polar warm front is pushing a tropical ice storm through the snow-swept beaches of Angleton, with thousands of vacationers, policemen and stray dogs...
This is patently absurd! I'm going to speak to the Manager and the Board of Directors, the Tea Lady and my Mum! You can't do this to me! I have waited all my life to momentarily clog the wireless-type airwaves with my shuttling wit and erudition! I have studied and learned and disseminated and perused and and and andANNOUNCER: Due to circumstances beyond our control...
And and and and and and, yet, and and and adn and andndndndndndndndndnddddd...
SFX: Ker-plunck!
ANNOUNCER: And a small case of apoplexy, we now conclude this special moment in the history of broadcasting and hope to return you to our regularly scheduled programming...as soon as we can find the satellite feed...
This has been Irritating Public Radio, Your Friends In The Air!
*SOB* my tenure....my lovely lovely tenure....
