President of the United States (POTUS)

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President of the United States (POTUS)-- the symbolic figurehead of the most advanced (in their eyes, anyway) country on the planet. A man elected to his position by a select number of his fellow humans, called an "electoral college". though, ironically enough, there's nothing collegiate about them. trust me, i've been to several colleges, and the people you routinely meet there couldn't give a Vegan whisker about any elections. Anyway, qualifications for POTUS seem to be very similar to that of the President of the Galaxy (PreGal)-- ie. photogenics, lousy taste in clothes, a huge penchant for sexual impropriety, and an even bigger penchant for fast food (in this case, a mountain of saturated fat and grease called "the Big Mac". See related article.) Incidentally, POTUS is also slang for "give us some of your drugs". a not entirely coincidental fact.

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