h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

As a card carrying "Fitness Fanatic" I have spent a lot of my adult life in gyms of various sorts and I chuckled along to your descriptions of the various inhabitants. I even saw a lot of myself in the grumpy fanatic; I've been told in the past that whenever I'm using a piece of equipment in the gym I look like I'm trying to break it.

There must be a thousand subdivisions of the main "clans" in the gym such as the scrawny guy who hangs out with the body builder types, eats nothing but tuna and chicken and drinks only protein shakes but never manages to add an ounce of weight to his skeletal frame; the overweight guy labouring under the misapprehension that lifting loads of weights will somehow cause him to shift his spare tyre; and my personal favourite, the middle-aged (usually) woman who uses a treadmill simply to "go for a walk" when it's a beautiful summer day outside because that way they've "been to the gym" and it counts as exercise.