h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

Why was I never allowed to eat the red ones when I was a wee one??

because the orange ones were nicer!

It's true. People say that all smarties taste the same, but that's just not true, the orange ones taste of orange. All the others just taste of Smartie ... not that that's a problem in itself.

But my mummy said they were actually bad for me!

Red Smarties were clearly your mums favourites! She didn't want you eating them 'cos then she'd have none ...

Then why did she throw them away??
Got you there!

She didn't really ... she only pretended to throw them away ... she was actually hoarding them for consumption out of sight ... trust me, I'm a doctor ...

Either that or she was the member of an international anti-communism league - "Ban the Red Smarties" ...

It never occurred to me that she was involved in some goverment cover-up!

Well there we go ... the things our parents do in the name of our "health"!

Did she have anything against aniseed balls?

No, she loved 'em. But then, I can't stand them.

It's conclusive then ... she wasn't working for government, she just liked red smarties!

So what was all that stuff about the birds and the bees?

I don't think I'm the one who should be telling you about that ... ... ask a grown up!

I thought I was

Here in the USA there was a time when a red dye (I forget the actual number assigned to it) commonly used to color foods was determined to be harmful in suffficient doses. Perhaps your Mom suspected that it was the coloring being used for red Smarties? Or perhaps it WAS the coloring used at that time?

grown up? Yes ... stuck with the peurile mind of 12 year old!

170889 - sounds like a ColdWar wind up!

when you eat your smarties do you eat the red ones first...da da da da da da da da da da da da da da da - Anyway red die yes I recall - never stopped me and I agree they do taste different - the mind is a wonderous thing - researcher 176727 - (real number 59853)

I have just asked mother!
She says that there was a big scare over E634748 (whatever the number was) which is the red food colouring they used to use.

Just a thought, but how did you broach such a topic of conversation?

Head on, I asked her straight
It's very easy to talk to my mother!