Police

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You have undoubtedly heard of the "Police", but not everybody is too clear on exactly what the police are. The fact of the matter is that it depends entirely on which country you are in. For this document, I shall be referring to the English Police.

First of all, you may have also heard them referred to by these words:

- Coppers
- The Old Bill
- Cops
- Pigs
- Scum

Feel free to use these terms in everyday conversation with other people, but it is not recomended that you use them face to face with the police themselves. So, what do the Police do?

The Police are a collection of people who get paid for putting people in big cages that are very difficult to get out of. In fact, very few of the people placed in these cages ever get out of their own accord. These cages are referred to as "Prison Cells". Police do not get paid vast amounts for this job, not surprisingly as they become very unpopular as they put people into Prison, but seem to generally enjoy it.

However, fear not, for it is unlikely you will be placed in a prison cell unless you have done something very wrong. In order to find out whether you are likely to be placed in one of these cells or not for your actions, consult the Law. These are a collection of rules describing how you should and should not behave.

Furthermore, the Police are the people you should talk to if you feel that someone has been breaking the Law. It is not recommended talking to them if you are the one that has broken it. They can be accessed in Britain through the phone by dialling 999. In America, simply dial 911. It is recommended that you only dial this number in an absoloute Emergency, as phoning it without a good reason does in fact constitute a criminal offence (Breaking the law).

One last note for you before I finish this; Police can be found wearing Blue uniforms, generally with a hat. However, certain police do not wear these uniforms, and lurk in civillian clothing waiting to catch the unsuspecting law-breaker out. So, be careful when in England; Be sure to have a copy of "The Law" and stick to it.

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