A Conversation for Bullying
robertanthony Started conversation Jul 30, 2006
I would like to hear from people who have been bullied by professionals.
I am registered as disabled yet when I was interviewed by a professional for admission to a university the professional lost her paperwork and said that she did not recall making offensive comments.
I have been put in a position were I must travel hundreds of miles to attend the same course while students who are not disabled can study locally.
In order to avoid scandal the university is stonewalling so that they can pretend to be unaware of my disability registration.
As far as I know I can claim social exclusion through the disability discrimination board. As far as I know I can claim that I have been put at unreasonable disadvantage to non-disabled students.
Have others experienced Institutional Bullying.
My bully is a respected counsellor?
marianne_unfaithful Posted Oct 13, 2006
I have watched a dear friend of mine suffering institutional bullying. I am a union representative (or I should say was). I resigned in disgust for their lack of support for this individual. I had encouraged her to call in the union to support her and they in turn submitted to the bullying from the powers that be. The branch secretary of that union is also an employee of the employer, they would have to be very strong indeed to bring in the region if they opposed the employer and in these days of redundancies and cuts many are just not cut out for the job. They are weak and ineffective and you can use all the policies you like, but if you haven't got the people behind you then you might as well just throw the towel in!
The problem is when someone has power over you, i.e., they pay your wages which you need to pay your mortgage, bills and to live, they will always have that power over you because you have given them that power. They ultimately decide where, what and who you can speak to. If you don't play their power game they get rid of you. The only alternative is for you to relinquish their power over you and leave... then you have to find another job, get over it and move on. Not easy for most of us.
My friend is in her late 50's not long to go to retirement and she has worked hard all her life. Where would she get a job now? Well she probably would but what would her standard of life be like as she no doubt in this dog eat dog world would have to take a substantial pay cut. Her physical health is not good.
I watched two of her peers almost destroy her. It was most distressing and I supported her in the only way I could by being there for her as a sounding board, but ultimately she had to make the decision on how to deal with it. Bullying is not tangible, it can come up behind you like a snake in the grass as it did for her.
It affected everyone in the building and it still is, but what did everybody do, they laid low, nobody wants to stand up and be counted.
But the spirit shines through - what goes around comes around eventually.
By the way we work for Mental Health!!
The-plantpot Posted Nov 24, 2006
I have got a feeling that I have just experienced something similar. I am a licenced door supervisor despite having bipolar disorder, and have just been dropped from my company, and I think it has something to do with the bipolar. What can I do??
Sally-Mary Posted Apr 5, 2008
At school, I was very insecure and extremely nervous around large groups of people. I hated classrooms and the dinner hall, and as a result, spent my first year and a half virtually excluded from the rest of the student body by my own fears. I avoided going to school wherever possible, even later, when I eventually made friends.
The teacher who was meant to look after the students and hear out my problems belittled me and treated me like an idiot, despite the fact that I got good grades even with the amount of time I spent out of school. Whenever I went to speak to her and try and get help, or to talk about my problems, she would make comments which I found not only unhelpful, but offensive. She once sent me straight back to a classroom full of people just after I told her I felt incredibly anxious around large groups of people. There were thirty other students in that classroom, and I eventually felt so bad I had to be sent home.
Whatever problems I had would be dismissed, or, if not dismissed, belittled. I became increasingly nervous, and often felt that I was the one to blame for overreacting. I missed more and more school and at home I was bad-tempered and angry. I ended up taking whole weeks off at a time because I was so desperate not to attend, even though I knew it was an overreaction to the situation and that I had important exams coming up in may. I was not given the support I needed from the person who was supposed to be giving it to me.
I gave up on her and started seeing a counsellor, who has confirmed that my problems were legitimate and that the way I reacted was perfectly normal. She has since helped me get over them, and I am no longer uncomfortable around people. It only took someone who was willing to take me seriously, look at the problem and attempt to help. I understand that teachers have lots of students to look after, but I was hardly the only client of my counsellor.
I consider the way I was treated- like a stupid child who was making a ridiculous fuss over nothing- bullying. She was acting as though my problems were nothing, and like she had more important things to be doing. I'm not saying my problems were more important than anyone else's, because they aren't, but the fact that she acted like this in time she was supposed to have set aside for me irks me, and the way she belittled problems that were all too real to me made me feel worthless and stupid. I sometimes wonder how many other people in my school felt the same way, because I know I wasn't the only one.
I think this sort of bullying is often overlooked. It's incredibly frustrating to have to deal with in, and can make the victim feel extremely alone, especially since it's often hard to complain about without sounding childish and petty. I really think people need to pay more attention to it, and try to get rid of it. It is just as much of a problem as the more obvious types of bullying.
RSajan Posted Sep 14, 2008
Disciplinary proceedings are resorted to by bullies above you. Your peers do not stand by you though they tell you that they know the truth about the proceedings. You are left alone. You have to fight your battles alone.
Your family recognises your plight. But it becomes an irritation to them by and by. They accuse you of being the cause of your own misfortune. The atmosphere at home changes. You have nobody to turn to at all.
One easy way to get back at them all is to kill yourself after posting detailed suicide notes.
hardworker20nyc Posted Sep 18, 2011
I have experienced a similar situation.
I applied to a graduate program at the University of Illinois at Urbana Champaign in the Dept of Chemistry in fall 2006. Ever since 2009, I have suffered severe psychological mistreatment and alienation. I was quite successful with my research, but I left because I pushed out of the University when all of my work was legitimate. I have a M.S in Chemistry but I am afraid I have been subjected to " Institutional bullying ". These events have ruined my life. I cannot even have a relationship with friends or women. My own family does not understand. Now I feel like I face public humiliation and my reputation on a social level has been destroyed. I feel like I am a target and I cannot stop it. Does any body have any suggestions? It is effecting my health and I do not know what to do. Please!
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