h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

Pip Pip




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Excellent Article
Excellent Grammar
Excellent Composition
Excellent Layout
Excellent Presentation
Five Stars



Time For A Laugh





IT'S ADRIFT,
SAID JONAH,
TO CAPTAIN BLIGH,
AS HE BEGAN TO ROW THE OCEAN,
WITH A WEARY SIGH

THROUGH A PARROTS' BEAK
OF CHINA BELLEEK,
WITHOUT A PADDLE
AND TONGUE IN CHEEK,
JONAH, DID THUS QUIETLY SPEAK

AND CAPTAIN BLIGH DID FREAK AND SHRIEK,
ON CATCHING SIGHT OF JONAHS' LEEK,
AND JONAHS' FEET DID PONG AND REEK,
AS THEIR ROWING BOAT STARTED
TO DRIFT, AND SQUEAK,
AND GROAN,
AND CREAK

AND JONAH DID THUS START TO QUIETLY SPEAK


IT'S A GIFT SAID PADDY,
EMBELLISHED NOT DRAB,
IT'S A GIFT THAT WE CALL,
THE GIFT OF THE GAB

IT'S THE GIFT OF THE GAB,
THE GIFT OF THE BLAB,
THE GIFT OF THE FLAB,
AND THE GIFT OF THE CRAB

IT'S THE GIFT OF THE PLOUGH,
THE GIFT OF THE POLE STAR ZODIAC NOW,
WITH THE STARS ABOVE,
FROM THE MOON WITH LOVE,
IT'S A GIFT SAID PADDY,
IT'S AN OLD BROWN COW

IT'S THE GIFT OF YARN,
IT'S THE GIFT OF SPIN,
IT'S THE GIFT OF CHARM,
IT'S THE GIFT WITHIN

IT'S THE GIFT OF LIGHT,
IT'S THE GIFT OF SHADE,
IT'S THE GIFT OF HOW
THE GAB IS MADE

IT'S THE GIFT OF THE MOON,
IT'S A GIFT IT'S A BOON,
IT'S THE GIFT OF THE LOOM
THE SUMMER MONSOON
AND THE COCONUT RACCOON

IT'S THE GIFT OF ART
AND SCIENCE TOO,
IT'S THE GIFT OF THIS BOAT,
TO ME AND YOU

IT'S THE GIFT OF THE SUN,
TO EACH AND EVERY ONE,
IT'S THE GIFT OF THE OCEAN BLUE

IT'S THE GIFT OF THE WIND,
iT'S THE GIFT OF THE RAIN,
IT'S THE GIFT OF HOPE,
IT'S THE GIFT OF PAIN

IT'S THE GIFT OF LAND,
AND THE SALTY SEA,
IT'S THE GIFT OF ARMS,
SUCH AS HAVE THEE

IT'S THE GIFT OF THE OARS,
THE BLISTERS AND THE SORES,
THE GIFT OF THE SCURVY SCAB

iT'S A GIFT, SAID PADDY,
EMBELLISHED NOT DRAB,
IT'S THE GIFT AS WE CALL IT,
IT'S THE GIFT OF THE GAB