h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

I'm sorry I don't have my homework, but due to global warming it spontaneously combusted on the way to school.

These are mine. Only work with the kinds of people who are sympathisable, and i suggest only using once at not-so-regular intervals.

- I left it at home sir, can i get it to you tommorow?

Hypothesis: Everybody's human, come on, give me a chance

(The Killer Maths Excuse)

- I left my maths book at home, can i borrow some paper?

Hypothesis: Too busy worrying about paper to take me down on the homework.

I also rely on luck, wit and quick thinking, but those are my 2 big ones.

The Best ones i find are:

(Say this quietly)"I Am Having A Couple Of Family Problems, i can try and get it to you tomorrow"
The teacher will pity you and feel guilty for asking. Note: dont use this one to much or else you might find that your teacher contacts a counciler.

If you are doing work that you need to print off just say: "My printer has run out of ink." or "My printer is broken". Works a treat the teacher may question it but its fool proof.