Masturbatory Euphemism

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Masturbation, being the number one hobby of every person on the planet (Whether they admit it or not) has picked up a number of different nicknames through out history.

In this section of the guide, I invite contributors to make note of their favourite euphemism for 'spanking the monkey', to use a euphemism for spanking the monkey. I invite all sorts of masturbation here - male, female, solitary, with-partner, even members of the animal kingdom need not feel unwanted. It's over to you.

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Infinite Improbability Drive

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