A Beginning ... and an End - Part I

Skankflop the Tikka took a swig of his Spazzy-pipe and sighed. "Will you never go to sleep ?"

He wafted the smog from his brow, and peeked at the youngster.

Two bright, pink, still-open eyes gazed up at him.

"Sod the little Brat ... why won't you sleep .. "

The lids of the child's eyes closed ... for a moment - then opened to reveal their new colours ..... deep turquoise.

Skankflop was in despair. He rubbed his nose, and scratched his arse. Three hours he had watched over the little worm ! THREE hours !! And told every tale he could. Twice !

But for one.

Skankflop spat into the corner, into the sand.

Can't tell that Tale yet, my Girl....

The child murmured; Skankflop squinted and looked down. Her eyes were now black. In the ever-dwindling light of the candle, the hint of a mouth, slowly opening and closing. A lock of white hair falling over a furrowed brow. Two tiny nostrils flaring at nothing.

Nothing?

Skankflop put his pipe to one side; he removed his fingers from his backside, and cupped them about his ears;

"There is trouble ahead, Little One ?"

The breath of Their Coming blew the roof from the hut, and the life from the candle. In an instant, all was black. There was no noise - none. The unicorns, sheep and goats died quietly, their lungs sucked out in an instant. The Men throbbed, then fell on their faces in the sand, feeling their innards convulse and vomit from them.

Skankflop gathered up the child, clambered through the roof, and ran.

As he ran, he knew he was finished. He was old, he couldn't run anymore, and he was finished. He could feel their breath on his neck. The Child closed her eyes.

Skankflop imagined that he heard, with each pulse of blood through his wizened throat, the words of the girl's mother:

"DON'T BLOODY DROP HER THIS TIME !!! - SHE'S THE CHOSEN ONE !!!"

"BITCH !"

Uh-oh. He hadn't meant to scream out loud ...

In an instant They were upon him. And the Child was taken, torn from his arms; sent mewling back to the void !

They gathered around Skankflop, and breathed on him. He felt himself wither - he was pressed to the ground, as if by invisible hands.

Then there was a Fell voice on the wind.

"Right then, Skankflop, me old Son. We're the Cliché Police, and you're nicked.

"S**t."

"S**t is right. You were warned before, that if we had to read anymore of this juvenile, sci-fi, "Chosen One", Wizardry, blah-blah-blah ......"

"But a chap has to make a living ... ouch ! Well everyone else does it ... Ouch !!! You ROTTERS !!!!!"

"And you can forget about 'Part II' - unicorns my arse ... mwahahahaha ...

And so it came to pass that Skankflop the Unoriginal was given a right good hiding. He having previous convictions for deeply dubious "Epics" and what not.

BUT...

..... they ALL lived happily ever after