h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

It's funny you should mention this, but first a few questions.

Why do eyelashes need to be curled?
How can you allow something that sharp and obviously destructive that close to your naked eye?

Back to torture techniques.

Back at home with my two darling sisters, who prey upon weak hungover people like a wolf on the fold, they take extreme delight in plucking my eyebrows in my weakened state.
They'll both be holding a glass of water, one sitting on my chest and the other holding back my struggling arms. Any amount of resistance sees the glasses of water split on the bed, which is not an attractive option, so normally they are allowed to carry out their fiendish plan till it's completion.

If I am able afterwards (physical state dependent), something occurs called "bucket-and-hose escalation", which involves saturation of the sisters.

The shame of it is that the seem to enjoy it, for they know that they've done their purpose of making sure that my eyebrows look good, and for some reason that's their solemn duty.

Maybe that too is "just a girl thing".

There are many "girl things." I do them, and even I don't understand them.

See now, is that really a good excuse for getting away with ANYTHING?

Eye feel compelled to point out that eyelash curlers are to make your eyelashes curl, rather than thicker and longer. That's masscara you're thinking of.

I shouldn't know that.

But by making the eyelashes curly they then appear longer and thicker, particularly when combined with the aforementioned mascara.

Well, it could be...
Personally I like having an all purpose excuse for that sort of thing. But you really don't have to believe us when we say things like that. I only know two people who will accept the "girl thing excuse: an idiot friend of mine, and my boyfriend, but that's a special case and i've only used it twice or so.