How To Make A Low-Grease Cheeseburger-Like Sandwich In Your Own Home

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Cheeseburgers. Don't they taste good? The author thinks they do, anyway, and he has come up with a recipe that makes a cheap, easy, low-grease cheeseburger-like sandwich1 in the comfort of your own home- it's basically a grilled cheese sandwich with roast beast.

Ingredients


-2 slices of bread

-1 slice of roast beast2

-1 slice of American cheese 3

-A bit of butter or margarine

Preparation

Prepare Your Tools


Take some non-stick skillet that will hold the bread and place it on a burner of your stove. Get a knife and a spatula4
out; place them on a plate for now, since you don't need them until you actually start.

Prepare Your Ingredients


Use the knife to spread butter (or margarine) on one side of each slice of bread. Place the cheese and roast beast in between the slices to make a sandwich; the butter should be on the outside of the sandwich, not the inside- the buttered side faces out.5 Put your sandwich in the skillet on the burner.

Cook It!


Turn on the burner to a medium-low temperature; use the spatula to flip the sandwich every minute or so until it is a nice goldern-brown on the outside. Turn off the burner and move the sandwich onto a plate; use the knife (again) to cut the sandwich into triangles6.

Eat!


You made it; eat it! Hopefully, the cheese should be melted to the bread and meat; eat it while it's still warm.


Best if served with Cambell's Tomato Soup (use milk instead of water; it's good that way. Add some cheese, too.)

Enjoy!

Alternate Ideas


A sesame-seed bun instead of buttered bread is rumored to be a good substitute. If you want a real cheeseburger, instead of some stupid little lunchmeat sandwich, fry up some ground beast7 by taking the amount you want on a sandwich, pressing it semiflat into a skillet on medium heat, turn, press, turn, press, and eventually it will end up hot, cooked, and tasty. Add one slice of cheese, and voila! You have a real cheeseburger... but you seem to have lost the quick and easy part of it...


Good eating, and don't panic!

Call For Action


This is, by far, not the only cheeseburger recipie out there. I'm quite certain that there are hundreds of thousands more, and they're probably better8. Discuss the recipies! Enjoy!
1 Well, it tastes the same, anyway.2Roast beef (deli sliced! this is for people who don't want to buy three pounds of hamburger!) is the most common. However, I've heard squirrel is good- although the author has never tried it himself.3 Most brands come pre-sliced and in their own wrappers. That is the right size of slice. If you want to use another type of cheese, go for it... but the author can't guarantee any decent results.4 Metal and plastic are OK, as long as they can handle the heat. One made of ice or any liquid would not be a good idea.5 This is what makes the sandwich an attractive, tasty, gold color (That Midas Touch) instead of resembling a charred black lump. Although you can get the latter even WITH the butter if you forget about it for several hours. The author knows from experience. 6 Or pentagons, or squares if you have to. Decagons are pretty, but hexagons tile best. 7Beef recommended again, although the author has tried and discovered ground turkey to be quite good. Squirrel for the culinairy explorers.8 In someone else's opinion.

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