h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

...time...accelerating...some..one...stoooop...ittttt

*presses button marked STOP*

phew...cheers mate....hmmm..i now seem to have infinite time before breakfast.

*presses button marked GO*

Siiiiiid.....y..o...u..SADIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIISTTTTTTTTTTTTTT..............

Sorry mate, I didn't quite catch that!

Sid you said wot?

2 days..that felt like 2 seconds, please switch it off, else i'll be dead tommorrow, or
it will at least feeli like it....

Owwww!, we can't have that!

*presses button marked *Reverse*

great, i'll get the chance to ask frances tegg to that duran duran concert.....

Was she a stunner?

*Sids nimble finger hangs over the button*

of course she was, but forget i mentioned it!!

Sorry, can't do that!

Not without pushing that meaningless piece of informaton out of my brain with some other equally completely meaninless piece of information!

*turns the switch marked HALF OPEN*

erm...meaningless information you say??
if something is meaningless, can it even be called information??
discuss

Mmmmmm?

*thinks about this while he has his tea*

Why yes it can!

This needs further elaboration....

It is only meaningless to someone for which the information received has no coherent understanding of the suspected meaningless information. But, non the less, it is still information!

The so-called meaningless information may only be meaningless to the reader. It may become less meaningless when other just as meaningless information is put with the first meaningless information, making it suddenly appear as useful information, which then may be used in the future to make more understanding of other meaningless information. A process we call learning!

So what have we learnt here?

Ahh yes, the information you supplied was indeed meaningless to the receiver, but of use to the writer. The meaningless information supplied will continue to be just that *meaningless*, until such time as
1. It gets pushed out and replaced with some other meaningless piece of information, or
2. The meaningless information is made less meaningless with the addition of another piece of information, making it become useful!

Is that clear enough!

so contarary to popular belief it is not 'meaning' that is subjective,
but 'lack of meaning'.....ahhhh.
Sid, i'd get some intellectual property on this before some dumbass like
Stephen Hawking gets his mitts on it.
Would finding some universally meaningless information disprove your theory?
I shall set up a research project on that...

Mmmmmm?

Youve got me waisting valuble work time on this theory now!

*scratches head*

Universally meaningless information I think is a contradiction in terms!

The information being in the category of "information" must have some meaning to something or someone. Even if the something or someone doesn't know the meaning of the meaningless information!

Only by getting the meaningless information will the something or someone have a lollypop in hells chance of understanding it's meaning, using the theory as stated in my previous posting!

Unless you can advise otherwise?

(takes OP aside, I think we may have stummbled accross something big here!)

i think you are overlooking a 'missing link' proffessor kidney.
TIME
jsut had a chat with mr hawking (dumbass) and he seems to think
that meaningless information also has a temporal instability, he
quoted some rubbish about the usefullness of making a dodo feathered
hat...and other such tripe.
I reckon we can make a bomb out of it

Orville and Wilber - flight
Watson and Crick - DNA
Kidney and Lurker - information subjectivity bombs

Hey!, I'm doing real well here if youve only managed to find ONE "missing link".

*scratches head again creating a small bald spot*

Don't be fooled by that Mr Hawkins (dumbass), it's all an act. Ive heard that if you give him a tin of Skipjacks Tuna, and he hasn't got a clue!

Kindney & Lurker..... I like the sound of that!

*goes off to quantify the newly discovered theory*