h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

-----------------------------------------------------
During the crisis we do ask for your cooperation. The Moderators have been asked to err on the side of caution, as this is another very sensitive time; this means that some decisions will have to be made that would not be made in other circumstances, until another major event comes along like a UK General Election, at which time we will again remove any political discussion that we feel pressure to remove. Please see the 'Relapse' section below for information on how we will revert to heavier political censorship whenever politics become most important, like during elections or wars.

The main things to bear in mind when using h2g2 to debate the current situation are:

* Using h2g2 to debate the current situation would constitute "political activism," so don't even bother trying to debate anything. Besides, "virtual elections are more fun anyway ."

* Be especially aware of the sensitivities of all others using the site; try to talk about only fun things or your hometowns, maybe a local restaurant or bog or your neighbor's giant ball of twine, because a "reasoned debate" smells a lot like "political activism" when BBC bosses start to worry about it.

* Do not post inflammatory messages, as these do not allow h2g2 to maintain an appropriately fluffy atmosphere; tensions run high during heated debates, and it should always be the responsibility of a web-host to prevent users from acting irrationally.

Comparisons Between Media Circuses.
--------------------------------------------------------
The media treatment of the disappearance of Chandra Levy should not be compared with that of the OJ Simpson trial. Everyone knows that the OJ story was way bigger, and pretty much overshadows even the Fatty Arbuckle trial, since Fatty was too dignified to drive anything as gauche as a white Ford Bronco. Comparisons with the Tonya Harding/Nancy Kerrigan Crisis are acceptable, but comparisons with the Amy Fisher/Joey Buttafuoco Crisis will be judged on a case-by-case basis.

Quoting from the BBC
-------------------------------
The following examples would not be acceptable and would be failed:

'Kate Adie said on the news last night that Gary Condit was...'
'The BBC said that Mr and Mrs Levy are planning to...'
'On the BBC news last night it said that Joey Buttafuoco had not been seen with Chandra since...'

Quoting from anyone, any attempt to communicate
--------------------------------------------------------------------
We will remove any Postings or Guide Entries that quote any source, regardless of the accuracy of those quotes. The reason is that the vast majority of quotes will not be 100% accurate, and misquoting anyone may make that person a target. Communication of any sort is potentially dangerous, so from now on, your contributions should be limited to random splayed-hand thumpings on your keyboard, series of numbers and wingdings and punctuation marks. h2g2 smileys should also be avoided, since these can be used to form heiroglyphic sentences such as
meaning "researcher expresses disapproval of moderation." For the duration of this crisis, guide entries may contain one complete word out of every 50 characters. Since conversation threads take more time for moderators to check, complete words are no longer allowed in message fora. We apologize for the qwertyuiop asdfjkl;.

Impersonating Key People
--------------------------------------
Researchers will not be allowed to impersonate Gary Condit, Chandra Levy or Kato Kaelin, as this could inflame any heated discussions on site, and Lord knows that we should be held responsible if any two members of the public should decide to have a flame-war on a website. We've seen how often in the past online communities have caused their innocent users to act irrationally, and we pledge to protect you from anything similar happening on h2g2. It would be much better to block users from communicating altogether, than to let them interact on h2g2 in the same way that they must interact with others in real life every day.

Inability to Acknowledge Parody
---------------------------------------------
Due to the serious nature of the current crisis and the severity of Gary Condit's expression, we will not distinguish between political activism and political parody, just as we know you are unable to distinguish between words spoken by "Kate Adie" and words written by h2g2 researcher "Frodo the Wordsmith - watching Quantum Leap reruns at my cousin's house /**=/" both of whom equally represent BBC.

Relapse
------------
You can create your own Guide Entries containing anything you want, from your opinions of world events to a description of your home town, except during sensitive periods when everyone should avoid political discussions, like during elections or wars.