h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

So, I've been ill for the last three days, no biggy just a headache, muscle pains and a strange problem with my eye muscles. At first I thought it was because I hadn't had much sleep the night before, so I rested through an entire day and, although that was bliss, I did not recover. Ever seen the sixth sense? The bit with the girl who was being kept sick by her mother? Well my mum had told me to have some piriton (it's drowsy you see and I still thought I was too tired). So I took one per day but my condition only got worse. Today after three days of being ill me and my mother both realised that the piriton I'd taken was about three years past it's use-by date. Unlike in the Sixth Sense this was not done intentionally because my mother had lost the box for the piriton and she is forgetful so I don't blame her. Still it's good to know I'm on the mend now eh?

Your mum didn't get that Piriton from the greasy bowels of your medicine cabinet did you? Oh dear.

She did...

Well, medicine cabinets are like that - there's no knowing what's actually in them until someone has the courage to take something and find out...