h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

Okay, so I don't do much with this thing. Well, you're right ... I set this guide entry up for the times I want to say something and not mix it with my others ...

Basically, today I'd like to talk about my cousin. No names mentioned!

So, me and my cousin have been close for decades. We've always looked out for each other and been there for each other, but, since I started working at the bar, mainly, she's got very ... ahem ... tactile. Put in another way, she acts like she's the horniest woman alive and that I'm the target of her affections, but then ...

She comes on to me, big time, and then fecks off! Sometimes on her own, sometimes to other guys. This is very, VERY, frustrating 'cos she gets me going and then leaves me high and dry ... Every time.

The thing is ... The thing is that, even though she TOTALLY turns me on (she is well babeworthy), I can't get out of my head that she's my cousin. I know, I know, it's quite legal for cousins to step on the good foot and do the bad thing (even to marry, but NO WAY!), but I just keep looking at this vision of babe-a-liciousness and thinking "It would be SO wrong!".

Am I being stupid? Should I just enjoy the nature of our relationship as it is? Should I feck the 'Arris off her? Does anyone think that she actually WANTS me to feck the 'Arris off her?

I just get so confused, after all, I AM a man and I DO want to have the old carnival knowledge with as many women as I can, but with my COUSIN?!?!?!

Please, someone give me a clue, 'cos I'm drowning here! What should I do, if anything?

Thank you for listening and I'll see you at my next moral juncture.

Shitsurei shiamasu!