h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

no, there was no limo waiting, though.

which night? both faces fused into one. sisters, and i loved you both. sisters, and i like to think you both loved me. one i loved. and you left before dawn. one i loved. and you were there, soft and gentle, pecking my cheek with closed mouth because your breath would have smelt of stale liquor and cigarettes. i had to go. years later, i wish i had just lain with you, holding you close to me-that was the first time i seriously thought of how good marriage might actually be. to wake up with someone next to you... but it was you i loved, not you. and you that i loved left before dawn. but you were not drunk. you were, and i will never be sure who it was that you were making love to.

the memory of those/that two/one night(s) has slipped into my soul. it is one memory. you were one person, in two bodies. i was two people, in one body. now i am someone else, and you will not know me. now you are someone else, and i would rather not know you. while i preach the virtues of pain, i cannot stand to see old wounds re-opened.

in a perfect world, you would be one. in a perfect world, i would be two. but it is not a perfect world, and i have lost you both. i have found myself, though. i have been washed in the blood. covered in slime, i have wailed, and have been heard. a new life, new perspectives. even a new geography. i just wish i could erase this memory of the mes and the yous. not in a chelsea hotel, but close. too close.

~baRuk