h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

Chapter one: Develope Psychic Powers of immensely uncomterble pain and eventual death.

The Story of Uritirus 24,



On the planet Uritirus 24 lived a group of rather primitive bipedal lifeforms. Their society known simply as the Uriti, was ruled by a corporate aristocracy. And it is not in this aristocracy were our story begins, in fact it begins with your everyday Joe. Now Joe, whose real name was Licknockchuck but who for one reason or another is known by history simply as Joe, was an everday buisnessman, which in the society of the Uriti was not a desirable posistion. It wasn't that the work was all bad, in fact it has been determined by the Five Fathers of Mathmatical Mastery that the job of a Uriti Buisnessman was in fact only 99.687% bad and so can not be considered for entry into the Galactic guide to the entirely all bad. But anyway we are straying from the subject. So as I was saying Joe was a buisnessman which meant he spent all of his days cooped up in a tiny little broom closet with nothing to keep him company but a small data module and the pile of papers which was feed by the little slot in his wall. What the pile of papers was for or