h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

I've been lying in bed listening to the rain and letting my mind run round the backyard to see if there's anything outside getting wet that shouldn't be (two loads of washing is all I can think of, which will be a relief if that's all there is). The rain is such a blessing at this end of the world, and I'm one of those that rarely complains about when and where it falls as long as it keeps the food growing.

I get up and start looking for some clean clothes. Ah, that's why I've been saying 'do the washing kea' for four days in a row I manage to find something to wear, even if a little odd, while contemplating putting on a load in the machine while there is heavy rain outside. I pull back the curtains, and sitting on a box staring at me is a cat. It's the heavy white cat that I see occasionally on my morning walks and that lives a couple of blocks and several dog properties away from here. It's always happy to see me when I walk past.

Heavy white cat has been sleeping on the folded rug on the box outside the bedroom window. It's such an obvious place for a cat to sleep out the rain but I've not seen this one or any of the other neighbourhood cats on this part of the porch before. In fact I've never seen this cat here at all before.

I go to open the sliding door and immediately see what's going to happen here. Heavy white cat has been sitting waiting, planning its ingress past the hapless, still half asleep kea. That's perhaps a little unfair, but it certainly figures out the advantages pretty bloody quick. I step out the door and close it hastily behind me. The morning is bright with wet light, thick dark clouds on the hills, the sky above clear and every tree dripping tiny, shiny jewels. Pretty cool possie, cat!

It starts in on the purring and the rubbing while I pat it, like I'm its long lost friend. The vibe I get is 'my people have gone off and left me and there's not enough food or company at home, purr, purr, I'm actually a lovely cat'. My mind flashes to, yes I will say good morning, but no you're not coming in, and if you've been abandoned then the very nice and helpful vets will try and rehome you but at your age it's unlikely to happen. Instant death. Ah, one of those mornings.

I manage to get inside again without the cat and find myself in front of the computer. I've been meaning to take part in the h2g2 journal month (can never remember the proper name for the month but will try to by the end) and people were kind enough to tell me what to write about when I asked, so here's the cat story. It's a cheat as it's already the 2nd of November here, but there are many advantages to living at the start of the world. I might write about those too.


(In case you are worried, I doubt that the cat has been abandoned, but I am curious as to how it found its way to my porch).

Ahh, it's not a cheat, we'll just "act local, think global" - there's plenty of November the first left scattered around different parts of the planet, so to my mind you squeezed in on time.

And I'm glad to hear about the clothes situation. It makes me feel better, being in the same boat.

Sounds like a nice kitty. I hope it gets home OK.

I have a small lizard on the inside of my sliding screen door. I've tried to get it to leave, but it goes in between the screen door and the glass door. I'd leave the screen door open, but it's Tuesday and I can't leave doors to the back yard open until the pool guy comes and leaves, cause the dog doesn't like the pool guy and will go out and bark at him and possibly bite him. The dog has no interest in the lizard which is just as well.

I'm a sucker for cats and would probably have let him in, fed it etc though keeping the existing mad moggie at bay. At 18 he don't take too kindly to other cats these days.

In my case the clothes situtation is a result of a broken washing machine. I can't keep doing them in the bath: I'll wreck my back. I'll have to set up something else.

Nicely written, kea.

TRiG.

Cats are very good at looking abandoned so they get extra food.

Thanks for this one kea.

Oh look, I'm about to have a flashback.

Once upon a time there was a stray cat, a very elegant tabby, that used to appear in our back yard. Dad would put it back over the various fences, a different one every time, thinking it would find its way home. But the cat kept reappearing in our yard, much to the annoyance of Sandy, the cat-in-residence.

Dad kept saying that he didn't want another cat, one was enough, that they'd only fight. We all pretended not to notice that he was handling this other cat with great care, tickling it under the chin as he put it back over another fence... We also didn't admit to noticing that Dad would put Sandy's food bowls outside sometimes.

Then one day we had an absolute deluge. Dad came inside, drenched, with a bulge under his shirt. The bulge wriggled a bit. Then a furry paw emerged between buttons, for all the world like an out-take from 'Alien'. 'The poor thing's soaked through', said Dad. 'I'll just keep him inside until he dries off a bit.'

That's how Fred Bloggs came to move in with us. He stayed for good.

Even acknowledging a cat is the thin end of the wedge...

That's a neat story. Any update on the cat? Did he get back home, or is he still around?

We have a 'yard cat', of sorts - he always hangs around, and is fed, but is not allowed to go inside. He was one of three siblings originally (but one sister disappeared fairly early on, hopefully adopted, and the second sister was hot by a car a few months ago <sad&gt who were born at one of our neighbours and have been hanging around our balcony ever since they were old enough to go exploring, and at first we would pet them and play with them but try to pretend that they have nothing to do with us, until one day my mum came home from the supermarket with a bag od cat food, saying 'they're so thin!'...
So, we feed him. But he's not allowed in. But he really wants to, so he sneaks inside whenever he can, only to be taken back out. It's like a game.

Oh, and I also had a laundry problem, but it consisted of a bunch of loads that were done but needed folding. And just kept accumulating on the sofa... eventually I sat down today and tackled the pile. Took some time, but it is now done. Yay!