h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

8 October 2005

40 days to go....
And I still have yet to come up with anywhere near the amount of cash I'm gonna need for this trip. Plus, in Georgia, one has to pay their car tag renewal fee each year before their birthdate. Aaaaand, my car insurance runs out this month. I have to renew my contract with Progressive as well! Add in a cell phone bill and Earthlink DSL....we're talking about somewhere between $180 and $220.
I worked at a condiment factory for two days this week. That has brought in a little cash. My gig in Atlanta is not until the 20th (or 21st, can't remember....better email Ron). Commence twitching!
Big Daddy really wants me to go to Columbus, as does Web Masta. I want to but if I don't have enough cash by 10 November I'm out. Everyone will be there on the 18th and if all goes well I will leave Georgia on either the 16th or 17th. I would like to hang around St Clairsville a few days, cause it's my home. It's where I feel I belong. Plus, I am NOT driving ten hours just to hang out for a day or two. Uh uh! It'll be at least a week before I'm chased outta town!

Columbus? As in Columbus, Ohio? *Scratches head, and shrugs* I don't get. Why there? Why not the moon? Or the Restraunt at the End of the Universe?
Also, job at a condiment factory? What kind of job is this? Assembly line worker or what?

Please explain yourself.
Mmm... biscotti... *chokes, coughs, and throws up a whale(????!!!!)* Now HOOOWWW did that get in there????!!!! Must be sleep walking... that's funny... I didn't go to sleep until about 3 am lastnight... uhhhh... plus... I don't live near an OCEAN!!!! WTF???!!!, mate.

Dude....you're starting to weird me out. Seriously.

Yes, Columbus, Ohio. I'm going there to see my friends (at least I hope I can). All I did at the condiment factory was pack pouches of tartar sauce and mayonaise. Sometimes I would have to dump the stuff.

Ummmm....you might want to take your happy pill now.

I'm just playing with you...I just like to freak people out a little, no harm done. You should meet my best friend, he REALLY freaks me out at times. But it's always funny, although it does sometimes get in the way of our conversations. He would make freakish lies about stuff when I try to get the truth out of him. FYI, the part about me staying up until 3 was real.

one of the very important rules madman, never let anyone weird you out make sure to weird them out everytime they try and do it to you. Doing that makes people stop doing that pretty fast

doesn't sound like the funniest job you can get

Or the most fun job. Must be quite boring... You know, there is this picture at the Picture Library under Jobs that is related to it. The one with the sleeping woman...

I live in DK and we're not that updated, here the sleeping woman picture is related to the woman who had to much to drink to past night *nods*

Waaa???? I think the name off it is "Assembly line".

so that is what assemply line means...... does that mean that assemply line workers are alcoholics?

....I'm actually an unemployed vet tech and amateur cartoonist.

Care to prove to us of your artistry? I don't know, give us a link to a website that features a couple sketches? Or have you not got the money to pay for something like that (which sounds the most likely)?

I have along the lines of Jack Schit. I'm unemployed. What makes you think I've got the cash to do that sort of thing? I had a free website but got so bored with it I took it down. That, and some dumb bitch at Dark Diamond wouldn't leave me alone about it. She is so thick, she doesn't get the hint that I DO NOT LIKE HER AND DO NOT WANT TO TALK TO HER!!
Besides....the scanner I bought doesn't work. I have to take it with me to Ohio so Big Daddy can make it work. I bought it from him over a year ago.

Madman, I own a domain you can get a free subdomain to for a while if you want. Can't offer you more then 50ish mb of space, but it should be enough to have some scetches on.

good luck with the getting a job thingie btw

have you tried just telling her that you don't like her and don't want to talk to her?

Yes, I have told her. She doesn't get it. She thinks I'm being funny.
Mutant, that's very kind of you, but I don't have a scanner. I really don't have anything to put on a web site, either. I tried to do a Hitchhiker's Guide fan site thingy years ago but it didn't come out too good. So I'm leaving such things to better qualified individuals.

tried yelling and screaming? That usually works..... otherwise just act like you love math, that allways scares people away

Well, inflating my underwear and putting it on my head didn't work. Drinking a s**t load of beer and belching "God Save the Queen" didn't work. Throwing a ten day old moldy ham sandwich at her didn't work either. My next attempt will be a Silly Walk accompanied by the Mormon Tabernacle Choir, singing "All Things Bright and Beautiful".

No wonder she thinks you're just being silly! The Math thing Mutant mentioned sounds promising. You could also try eating and (somehow) get it all over your armpits(?!). But that would probably also be taken as some joke. Do you have a digital camera? You could use that as a substitute for a scanner. And by "Big Daddy", do you mean that chain of stores, as in "Big Daddy's Fireworks" or "Big Daddy's Outdoors"?

Digital camera is crap.
Big Daddy is a nickname for my friend, Ken, who lives in Ohio. He's married to Web Masta, aka, Sonia.

Oh. (I don't have much more to say than that.)