h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

Not too good at the moment. Need a place to live, I hate my family. It's official. Got a bit of a health scare going on (not cancer, thank my god) but still....I can't help but worry. Still don't know whether to book that summer holiday - supposed to be going on an 'educational field trip' to Barcelona with college, but I don't know what's going on. And one of my closest friends suffered a bereavement. It's all fun and games all down my way! Ach well, at least I have London to look forward to.

Hello. The London thing is definitely something to look forward to, isn't it?

What's up with your family since you officially hate them? It sounds a bit harsh to hate your family. I have to admit I wasn't very keen on my family for a while before I moved here, but I solved that by.. Moving here.

Heard anything else from the medics on the test results yet? You feeling any better (guess you would, or you wouldn't have been at school last week and at work)?

No I really do hate them. There is nothing I'd like more than to live away from them - I can only take them in small doses, which is why I just hole myself up when I'm at home. Yeah, it's that bad .

I'm going to the doctor's tomorrow, so I hope everything's ok. I've still been feeling kinda bad but college isn't exactly mega-hard work, and come to think of it, neither is work. and it takes my mind off things too, although when I was discussing it with one of my tutors he recommended going for the operation - eek!

And yeah, London should be a good laugh. I'll find out for definite this week if I'll get a loan of money to go - otherwise, and I hate to say this, I'm just gonna have to pull out.

Okay. Just for the record, I never saw that last statement. You ARE going down to London to meet the guys. It's going to be great fun. Let's remember that I'm going to buy for those HooToo videos. That'll get you some drinks, at least. So, then the only thing to consider would be the cost of the car, where an agreement could be reached. Don't worry about it. I think the others would join in as well, if they knew you were considering pulling out at the last instant. When were you supposed to get paid from Curry?

It seems as if you can stand your family about as much as I can stand my flat mates at the moment, then. I come home, get something to eat (well, at least sometimes) and then I go in to my room, close the door, and mind my own business. If I go out to get something from Tesco, I tend to not ask them if they need anything anymore, as they never ask me.

Operation? What operation are you talking about? You haven't said anything about an op before, have you? Or did you? Hmmm.. I seem to recall somethign about surgery. But still. I don't think it's anything to be seriously worried about since you're up and about, doing the school thing and the work thing and all that.

And to round things off, heres a to make you feel better.

for fords

I do get irritated sometimes, living at home. Surprisingly, this tends to vanish when I get home at night to find a proper meal waiting in the microwave though

And yes, don't worry about the costs of the car etc - we can work something out We would feel all the poorer if you didn't come

Well, then you're lucky, Jamie, to actually find a meal in the microwave. Or to even have a microwave!

See, fords? Told you the others would join me in wanting you to come down and meet everyone. The Dutch, the English, the Swede (other than I) and the Italics. And we're going to do a photo hunt!!

Like I said, it's one of the things that makes living at home bearable

That sounds like the start to a joke. "A Dutchman, Englishman, Swedishman and Italic walk into a bar..."

Except everyone knows the punchline "...and got completely sloshed."

Okay, maybe not a very good joke then

Hehe.. Maybe not the best joke in the book, but still. And you did forget to add the Scotsman in the lineup as well.

Ah, but the Scotsman was probably in the bar already.

Not so much a joke as a prediction

You're probably right.
So..
"A Dutchman, an Englishman and a Swede walked into a bar and found a Scotsman already sitting there...."
".... and then the Swede said: 'But I thought it was a penguin!'"

So, we have the beginning and the end. What about the middle?

I got a joke from Zantic this morning involving a penguin, oddly enough.

It wouldn't get past the moderators, though

The penguin at the freezer in the shop and the ice cream?

Nope, this one involved the Seven Dwarfs and the Pope 8)

crikey, the residents of Lothian are having a fine time of it at the moment

On the bright side, apparently about 500 jobs are transferring to East Kilbride, so it could be worse.

Oh wait, having to move to EK. Yup, that is worse

It's good if you like roundabouts, and... and...

What else is in EK?

Oh.. I know the Joke about Dopey and the dwarf nuns.

I've only been in Ek once, and I didn't find anything worth staying for, so I watched the football game I was there to see, and then went back home...

Ask Mrs V about EK sometime. I believe she has some strong views on the subject

Ooooh.. Nice.. I'll have to do that. Always good to get other people's views on different subjects.

Hey guys!

I finally got logged on, and my money worries are over, yay! I got £180 (had to give back my mum the £20 I owed her) but wow, people really do care about little old me . And I'd just like to give you all a big back. Lost, the videos are yours, seriously. They only cost me a fiver on Ebay!