h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

Yup, that's what I said, ROBOTICS! Y'know, sometimes I feel like I'm supposed to be a robot. I've discussed this with other women in like situations and they agree. I feel that I am supposed to care for everyone and everything without those nasty feelings such as: frustration, anger, sadness, longing. . . .I'm not supposed to be a real person with real feelings or desires. I'm the one that's here, I'm the one that's responsible, I'm the one that grows tired of it all at times.

I often fantasize about escaping - just for a bit . . .all alone. Just me, some books, perhaps some wine, scented candles, my journal . . .

I long to stroll on the beach and look at the stars and the only sound is the surf crashing upon the sand. I'd like to hide away in a little cottage with a nice soft bed and fluffy covers. I'd like to take Felix the cat with me . . .

Of course, I would return eventually. Because this is my life and I do love it and those in it, I just really want a break. A time to relax, a time to think without being talked at. A time when I don't feel that I have the weight of the world on my shoulders. Less responsibility. Time to dream and explore.

Maybe I'm being selfish and should be resigned to my circumstances, but when I tell that to my heart, it doesn't agree. It tells me there could be more, there may be more, there should be more.

Ha! I'm replying to my own posting! Or, maybe I should just say this is an addendum . . . .He wants a friggin' robot, then that's what he shall get! But I will not be prevented from being real with others. I know there is someone out there. There's got to be someone out there. Simply because I need someone to be out there.