h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

It's weird this no man's land between Christmas and New Year; the borderlands.

In terms of h2g2 I just came off one thingy...and am onto another for 24hours; confined here. It's about seven now since new h2g2. Am I really that mad, bad, and dangerous to know? Did I ever post that I hoped a researcher here died in a car crash?

Did I let rip in the most vile fashion towards someone on their PS, in the last hour of a web site, when the mods had gone home?

But I won't be ever settled or happy though all the time I am permanently estranged from the person I love most here; and that was certainly all my own fault. That's probably a life sentence though.

Sent an email earlier to a friend I lost touch with for a couple of years. A theatre diector. A brilliant woman who taught me so much about the mysterious skill of acting.

Late night egg and chips

Something discomfiting is certainly happening, isn't it.

I made the mistake of peeking out of my self-imposed confinement and had a very response.

And, I've certainly had it made clear to me that if I find a post here to be rude or offensive in some way, there's absolutely no point in doing anything except ignoring it and moving along.

Well, if I'm not wanted here, I'll just offer what *is* wanted: my absence.

But this is new h2g2 where everything is *contextualised*.

That's now the game

If your face fits you can more or less do what you want.

But if it don't...tough s Or get a new face...

Your absence isn't wanted or needed.

It's a transition period.

Lets see how we all are this time next year.

All the time ~ jwf ~ is here, I'm here if allowed. He's my litmus test and blue touch paper.

What's wrong? Why are you so hurt and angry? Are there private feuds that I don't know about? Are they connected with the mean (in both ways - hurtful and small-minded) gang responses you got on the entry reviews thread?

No Jabs.

You can't know everything...

I'm getting there.

No worries. (Well apart from just about everything ).

I had a bit of an upsetting (in a `petty way) phone call today (you can imagine what it was, Effers) and ended up spending far too much time drowning my upset online.

I'm going to go away and read old history books now instead.

Hey s

I'm listening to the Cure.

I really love them so much...very aptly name band.

I'm cool if you don't want to tell me. I was just going to offer support if you needed it - and not being nosey, it's ok. I'm probably better off for not knowing. Thanks.

Jabs

Up and about again.

Apparently Kim Jong Il's 2 day funeral has begun. They played a bit on the BBC. Lots of wailing from the commentator.

(Mind you I'm not very keen on the BBC 5live presenter. Very transatlantic, loud, jokey and chatty...maybe I should switch back to Radio 4 for a bit.)

Interestingly, apparently in South Korea there is a Law whereby you can't publicly make protest in favour of North Korea.

Some shrines were smashed up in the south. The authorities did nothing. The smashers were doing the government's job for them presumably.

So much for the myth of freedom under capitalism then.

What the hell are they scared of?

This is *rhetorical*

Do you ever get to that point of no return?

It's a JOURNAL...I expect that to be taken account of. And I'm not allowed to post anywhere else without punitive measures being taken against me.

I'm not talking something stupidly literally dramatic like suicide or even common or garden, 'self harming'.

Just 'what's the ing point?'

All the good things in yourself have no outlet.

there is no point.

Even if you have a heart of gold, which I do actually have, (it can be well hidden at times...most of the time really).., there is no point.

You just get hurt a whole lot more.

Hopefully my genotype will die out. I couldn't imagine being able to cope with bringing up a child...and honestly I'm mostly gay. So hopefully it will die out.

I don't really understand why my genotype is still around at all.

Feeling less nihilistic than earlier.

But I'm sick of coming here and being just about to post on a general thread, forgetting that is verboten...and I'll be back on some other punishment stage if I do that.

At midnight tonight I'm allowed to be normal again.

I'm so incredibly happy to have just heard back from my theatre director friend...and that she was so happy to hear from me.

She has a one year old son now.

Crikey that was unexpected. And I'm so relieved she thought I was a person worth keeping in contact with...

I love her a lot.

> So much for the myth of freedom under capitalism then.

Meh. Capitalism varies. Some versions of it are freer than others.

TRiG.

Of course.

But so often the way its presented is Freedom=Capitalism.

And I've heard a might of sneering on the BBC about the funeral and the fake tears.

But now suddenly today I found out the kind of strictures in place in South Korea about freedom of expression or NOT as it appears.

We don't hear much about that.

> fake tears

Yeah. I wonder how much is fake and how much is cultural difference. Keening was common in the west of Ireland until relatively recently.

TRiG.

More to the point, how things are presented by media.

In a society like North Korea with a 'leadership cult' there is going to be lot of genuine emotion when a leader dies. And yes there will be some fake. But its presented to us as if its *all fake*.

When Diana died, how much was fake or not?

The police sergeant standing in front of the railings where I was began weeping like a baby when the service was relayed to us. I felt absolutely nothing emotionally myself...except fascination with the whole event.

But I do think I will be genuinely upset when the Queen dies.