This is a Journal entry by Ducky - Chief CPU CEO: The Right Hon. Ms Ducky, QC, PDQ, PMT, ADHD et al.

Hmmm

Post 1

Ducky - Chief CPU CEO: The Right Hon. Ms Ducky, QC, PDQ, PMT, ADHD et al.

Well, I finally got my script back from the BBC, they were just inside their time limit of four months.

It actually got past the first stage (to just read ten pages then send it back) and I actually got feed back as well. All of it is constructive critisism although they do subtly say that I am quite good at planning. At least there's one positive.

I'm actually more happy about the postcards they sent with my script. They've all got quotes on them from different people. I have a favourite out of the four and it's one that says this:

"You get knocked down, you get up again. I also think writers must have great courage, the courage to trust you own life and your own voice."

What do you think of it?


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Post 2

Sapna- Melt hearts NOT ice caps <3

good for you
the way you look at it is there is no bad thing about it
i think
because you were happy about getting the postcards with different opions


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Post 3

Ducky - Chief CPU CEO: The Right Hon. Ms Ducky, QC, PDQ, PMT, ADHD et al.

The postcards were standard ones from the BBC with different quotes on them. I just thought that one was true. You're opening yourself up to critisism willingly. It is quite courageous.


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Post 4

Whats_ina_name

That's very true ducky, you were brave by sending it in in the first place, and by letting it be open to criticism and at least you got some positive feed back as well. And hopefully you will find some of the criticism helpful.


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Post 5

Ducky - Chief CPU CEO: The Right Hon. Ms Ducky, QC, PDQ, PMT, ADHD et al.

Yes, I rewrote the first scene and got someone to read it for me, they said it was much better.


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Post 6

Brown Eyed Girl

I'm interested to know what they said about it - particularly since I only got to read an early draft and not the finished version smiley - tongueincheek


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Post 7

Ducky - Chief CPU CEO: The Right Hon. Ms Ducky, QC, PDQ, PMT, ADHD et al.

Well, techinically it's not finished anymore, as I am going to edit it. But you can see the comments.

The writer has worked out carefully how her small and intensely emotional stories will intersect in moments of tenderness or brutality. The planning and plotting of the events in thorough, but it becomes ver exposed in the writing, which has acquired a regular, formal atmosphere. There’s no sense of a real world running out of control here – scenes are brief and crisp, delivering the necessary information in Spartan and very direct, sudden dialogue that offers little in the way of distinctive idiom or rhythm. The emotional journeys of the women are especially complex, but they are not matched by an ambition to really express them in dramatic dialogue or scene-writing. The men are treated with less sophistication. There’s a restrained quality to this writer’s work that comes across here as being an arm’s-length – and the arc of these dramas comes across as schematic.


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Post 8

Brown Eyed Girl

Alright, but the version I read, half the scenes read "coming soon".

From what I've read of your other writing, those comments do seem to be fair.


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Post 9

Kitish

Constructive critism! Always useful and way to go ducky! First script sent and returned with good advice to aid with developing it!!!

smiley - biggrin

I'd be interested in seeing how you develop it based on what they say actually. I do agree with much with what was said but thats more hind sight after reading what they had to say....

So when's the new script going to be ready? Or are you busy with revising at the moment or should I not mention that word...smiley - tongueincheek


Hmmm

Post 10

Ducky - Chief CPU CEO: The Right Hon. Ms Ducky, QC, PDQ, PMT, ADHD et al.

Erm, I should be busy revising but I been too busy playing on the Wii smiley - biggrin I have more Geology notes to write up and Chemistry papers to do.

I did edit one scene the other day and I am planning to go through it, but gradually, taking my time.

In all honesty, the script isn't the best thing I've ever written and some scenes were way below par but I do keep reminding myself that I'm only 16.


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