h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

Well, I finally have some good news to say the least to put up here! My dearest-darling, beloved has gotten her divorce (finally) and is now happily moved in!! Who knows, within a year or so Mom may even get her wish and finally become a Gramma!!! Now THAT'S a scary thought!
~S

Now this sounds serious. Yes everyone, I was born to be a grandma and I want those grandchildren before I run out of steam. Grandmother's should be energetic and love to bake chocolate chip cookies. If I wait much longer, my grandchildren will have to settle for store bought cardboard instead. Grandmother's should be able to carry a great tune when singing wonderful nursey rhymes like "itsy bitsy spider", again if I wait much longer, all I'll be able to do is give out with a good croak. And finally, that rocking chair that I purchased several years back looking forward to the day when my large round lap could squeeze two or three youngins upon it while we all take afternoon naps, is still waiting for an occupant besides myself.

Golly gee Ma, we're doing all we can here. We're practicing almost everyday and as you know practice makes perfect and we want to give you nothing but the best when it comes to grandkiddies! We're trying to figure out how to get a boy first, so any suggestions would be most helpful...anyone...anyone?

Well, we'll just have to keep on practicing until we get it right!
~§~