h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

"You think the Welsh are the true British?"
That's not what I meant by what I said, but yes, in a sense the Welsh are the true Britons.
Most folk in the UK consider themselves to be either, English, Welsh, Scots, Irish or British. I'm British, rather than English, this because I have Welsh, Cornish and English heritage and because certain political elements too.
I tend to only consider my heritage on my mothers side for personal reasons.

I have seen the film. Tis quite amusing.

There's quite a bit of Nordic blood mixed in in a scattering of place across the Isles...

If I ever get to Canada, it will be via Michigan and there's someone there I'd very much like to see.

I didn't want to ask you if you prefered your mother's side because of personal reasons. I can overstep personal boundaries. I should retreat.

Well, survive and visit that person in Michigan soon.

btw. Myrddin is Welsh for Merlin.

I'll visit Michigan just as soon as I've a couple of grand to spare.

Myrddin is Merlin?



Now I know better. I like that name.

You need how many pounds to get to the US and then to Canada? How many thousands of dollars? Are you a student like myself who is in abject poverty?! I hate my situation, LOL, but I am on a path to success.

I work during the summers. This summer, I plan to make a good and fair sized fund for me to subsist on throughout my next school year. I hate my situation and my life sometimes, but I will survive.

If you are a student, what Degree are you taking?

Yes, Myrddin is Merlin.

"You need how many pounds to get to the US and then to Canada?"

The US - UK exchange rate might make it a bit cheaper, I don't know, but yes, it would cost more than I have.

No, I'm not a student. My agoraphobia and social-phobia got so bad that I had to leave college when I was finishing my A -levels and haven't worked or done academic study since.

What were you taking in University?
What academic subject are you interested in?

I can be very anti-social. But my primal need to socialize is like a hunger for food, and so I go out and talk with people. I am like a struggling animal.

I used to be agrophobic because I survived a rape.
After the rape, I kept myself inside my parent's house for a year, and during that time I only went outside to go to the grocery store or to the post office.

When I was agrophobic, I was afraid like a person who had been airbombed or blitzkrieged. But then I said, "Screw this noise!"

Eventually justice was done. The man who raped me had also molested three other women after me, but in domestic abuse cases. That man has now been put into jail because I was called forward to witness against him, and my testimony was completely credible without doubt.

During last summer, I appeared at the preliminary hearing which concerned the aforementioned man. I worried last week if I had to appear at the trial, which was to happen next week. But the defense lawyer plea bargained and the man accepted sentence. So no trial had to happen, since my testimony combined with the other women's testimony was completely credible.

I am doing better now -- I am surviving!
When I go outside, as you can tell, I take pictures. I like to photograph. If you would like to see more pictures of fabulous Canada, then I can show you, however, not now because I do not have a scanner!

"What were you taking in University?"
I wasn't at Uni, I was at college.

I'm not anti-social, I just find social situations extremely stressful.

I was raped when I was 6.

I like photos as long as I'm not in them.

Raped at 6?



I hope that you are not haunted by that experience.

I know that I have a lot of hellish memories, and if they arise again, I will relive that hell. I cannot get better if I am always in hell.

I am not only talking about being raped, but also about rejection.

To keep myself well, I try to do good for other people. I try to be accepted as an invaluable friend. I can be used because I can be foolish. I have two invaluable friends, ...well 3: My mom, Silvana, and Armande. My brother also counts but he is a talk, dark, and silent.

"I hope that you are not haunted by that experience."

Not by the experience, but it has had it's affect on me, who I am, the way I view the world, it affceted my choices and reactions in other things in my life that all lead to my going to hospital for 5 weeks 2 years ago unable to control the things driving me take my own life.

I have been in the same place. Not the same hospital, but I was taken to the same category and I was driven to end up there by my own misery, depression, anger, self-loathing and hatred towards other people.

My current long-term boyfriend visited me at that time. I was partly blaming him for myself being in the mental health hospital, and I was certainly blaming myself.

I really loved HIM to the point that I became sick. My mother's love has never made me sick, but this romantic passion did. I was afraid that if he left me, I would lose the part of my soul that I shared with him. I was afraid of being robbed, and this fear spirled me into misery.
My fear was correct and not false. If I would have married him, I then would not be as mature and able as I am right now. I certainly would have never realized how much my mother means to me if I kept in that confining relationship.
When I was involved with him, I was in a very small world, a metaphorical small box, in which I couldn't do much except be there for him. He liked my spirit but I wasn't right for him, he bridled me and I started to despair.

I am spirited but I certainly believe in monogamy. I hope to find the right rider, and I will take him places. He will love me because I am invaluable.