h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

Well, Christmas Day involved just myself, husband, mother & . The three of them fell asleep in the afternoon Unfortunately I was making a cake & trifle for the next day when my daughter & son-in-law would need feeding. It was a quiet, relaxed day - thank goodness as I still am not well after 4 weeks & very tired.

Boxing Day went well too - my daughter, etc had spent from Friday night to Monday morning with my son-in-law's parents, then they came on to us for lunch and were to leave the following day. She is 8 months pregnant, still working, driving & looked very drawn.

It went fine here, until they were leaving - she said something & I made a small harmless (I thought) remark (having bitten my tongue all Christmas I may add & feeling ) - she exploded, storming off to the car - that was Tuesday & I haven't heard a word from her since. There was no farewell , which I am still missing.

I feel she should make first contact, I am fed up with having to watch every word I utter in case it "upsets" her (she is heavily pregnant at present, but she's like this most of the time anyway). She acts like a spoilt brat at times - maybe she is - I did try not to spoil her when she was growing up with no father, but I did ensure she had everything that was really needed, etc.

Are all kids (27 years) like this? I had her when I was 22 & I know it made me grow up superfast, so maybe when she has the baby the same will happen. She has everything planned out, including going back to work after 6 months & working till 2 weeks before the due date - the remark she made was that they were not having any visitors for the first 2 weeks to enable them to "bond" with the baby - I just said "you'll be lucky!"

Comments most welcome.

Hi shirps, I snuck in for a visit. Not to much to tell. I'll get to that later. 1st, I think daughter is not uncommon child. Seems that all one has to do with children is to say something that might be taken as a suggestion and the parent is invading their space and can only be made to back off by replying in a biting and sometimes loud remark.

I see that here, there and even in Denmark.

I guess I led a sheltered life. I never would have imagine that the whole world is just as depraved or as idiotic as we Americans. I have been listening and reading BBC news and when I can find English news station in other parts of the world. Such is the egotism of being an untraveled and uneducated American. This has nothing to do with the bay bay. I am just realizing there really is nothing new under the sun. This includes the fact that our children know more than we do.

Perhaps we were the same. But you can tell her from here that if she thinks she can isolate herself, spouse, and child for two weeks she will be lucky. No, I take that back. If successful they will p*ss off a lot of family and friends. And I can not recall how many expectant parent made plans to work up to a certain time and then find out Mother nature has her own plans.

My Boss, Andi, has a daughter or daughter in law that was to have a baby in Mid February. So she had it mid December. I wonder what plans she had?

Maybe L thinks that watching a baby sleep all day long is bonding? Wait till she is up night after night while baby is screaming bloody murder and L won't have a clue as to why. She is going to need this time for help from parents and friends to assure her that everything is normal.

Just wait till she spots some discoloration on the baby, the baby sleeps too long, the baby is not sleeping enough, baby not taking as much feed, the baby wants to feed too much, well you remember don't you how easy it is to panic when you don't understand what is happening to the baby? And you don't get that larning (US Western cowboy slang) from books.

A couple of days ago my daughter from across the street called me and tells me she has no gas. She still had hot water but the stove and furnace would not light. Had the gas company come out and they told her there is no gas coming into the house. So they bring in a back hoe and dig up the lawn and discover the pipe has been rusted through. We got a plumber in to fix it which was an all day project. We borrowed the money from my oldest son and from my brother-in-law.

Yesterday my bathroom sink stopped draining. I was lucky. After a couple of hours of running the water back up the drain pipe I was able to open it up.

HAPPY NEW YEARS!



MFL

A Very Happy New Year to you too, me ol' friend

I think I am frightened that she is just planning a little too much, but maybe I have underestimated her & she has planned for any eventuality anyway.

The ways of doing things have changed so much since "my day" - I had no idea of what was really going on, but then there wasn't the information around so much. I was living back with my parents to be closer to the hospital, therefore, I relied on my mother & grandmother to advise me on any problems & I trusted my specialists to monitor everything. I think having a baby was a family event then & in alot of families it still is!

I live some distance from her & I don't drive, but I hadn't intended to crowd their space at first anyway ... or ever, but I really felt the remark was aimed at me & not put in a tactful way at all.

Maybe I'm being touchy, but I'm not too well at present, Mo. I know this sounds daft, but I had glandular fever when I was about 17 - they warned me then that I could have flareups if I became really rundown. Well, last year has been eventful & I am a bit of an inward worrier. So what with my op, my brother's hip op & my mother's continuing illness (& working on the society all summer to get it ready for the "handover" & being depressed at giving it up) - together with hoping L is OK - I have got very under the weather. I caught a sort of cold at the beginning of December, but I still feel ill together with my glands coming up every evening & very depressed - a sign of gland. fever. Also, I've had conjunctivitis & an old wound to my eye nearly opened up again - a continuing fight with eye drops at present.

Sorry, I've gone on, but I know you'll understand - I feel really down at present & alone. R is being very good & letting me rest each afternoon, but I just want to shake it all off.

If it wasn't for my mother I think I'd suggest to R that we emigrate somewhere - hmm, maybe one day we will

I really hope you are doing OK & I know your problems are alot more serious than my little worries, but it is good to be able to talk

As my grandad used to say to me: "poor little rich girl" (not that I was ever rich, but he used to say that when I was little & felt "it wasn't fair")

Hey Shirps,

Let's hope that it is the eight months of being pregnant that really set her off. In any case, in my opinion, you did nothing wrong. But sometimes buttons can be pushed without trying. Believe me, I know, having lived so many years with a lady who PMS'ed. I never knew when Bon would take something I said the wrong way and start to destroy household items and threatening divorce.

I wish I could repay you for your help this past year and give you some good advice. But other than to suggest something like Yoga to try and bring in some inner peace, listening to you and to beg you to Please, Please quit smoking.

I admire your surviving all the things you have and to have raised a daughter who is as successful as she has proven. You can pour out your frustrations to me as much as you want. Hopefully it will help you as much as it has helped me pouring out my problems to you.

You got to try to think more of your successes. Your daughter for one, R for another, doing all of this under more pain most of us will have to endure let alone know. In spite of the stress of the society it should be considered one of your greatest successes. I will never get the oppertunity to be given a personal escort to the front of the line to see the Crown Jewels while a hundred photos are being taken to be put into Japanese scrapbooks. And of course there is Holly.

Hey, I could go on and on. I guess every one is someone special. You however are a special person to L whether she realizes it or not. If you ask R I would bet he will tell you the same. Even with all the physical distance between us you are special to me as well.

So, let's take it easy now. Quit pushing yourself so hard. I suspect you put out too much effort when the kitchen was being redone. You have a new adventure ahead with the pending birth of your grandchild. And if L gives you too much grief around how the kid is being raised then get even by spoiling the heck out of him/her when L isn't looking.

I was just thinking, I still haven't gotten a view of your new kitchen. How about a shot of R grilling up some eggs and flatcakes on that new stove. You have my E-mail.

As for emigrating - I have wanted to do just that also. I wanted to go to New Zeland or Australia but I think I have gotten to old. Besides I hear they speak a funny form of English there, saying things like, "Crikey!" What's up with that? Where were you thinking of going?

As I said before I look forward to hearing from you. You have made me laugh when I didn't think I had a laugh in me. Your encouragement has helped wonderously. I am doing fine. Mostly because some fine English lady brought me out of terrible funk of my own doing. I was also lucky to have a wonderful Danish friend who had given me much good advice.


If I could give L some advice, it would be: Don't plan out your life. Have realistic goals but don't think you can plan your life. Life has a way of knocking you off your feet when it comes to plans. You and I know how that is.

s

MFL


Bonnie just came through wearing her new Pajamas. We got them tonight and she really seems to be pleased.

Thanks Mo

Piccies will be winging their way towards you during the next few days

My mother has an appointment to see a gastric specialist next week at the hospital &, although I was supposed to be somewhere else, I feel I really must go with her. She was again last night & again this morning - I am sure that taking 18 tablets per day are causing it, but the doctor seems either unaware, scared or just too plain stupid to alter the drugs, as the hospital put her on them last summer for her heart. She has aged so much in the last year & got a whole lot weaker - she sleeps most of the time. She didn't spend New Year's Eve with us this year, because she said she'd be asleep before 10pm. As you can imagine I am really worried about her - that's why all this other upset is not having much of a beneficial effect on me getting over this virus or whatever either! You can imagine the effect on my diabetes: control? what control

I must admit the language problem would be a concern, but our language is changing so much now - some words I either can't understand the pronunciation or even the meaning of the word - so maybe it wouldn't be too bad

As Marvin said: "Life, don't talk to me about life - brain the size of a planet & all they want me to do is park cars" - or similar

I just wish things had been different when bringing up L - I would have dearly loved a proper house & everything, but I made a big mistake, so it was my fault I suppose Still, we all make mistakes, so theoretically I'm no different to anyone else Trying to be positive here

You keep up the good work Oh, Tartaronne was asking if I had heard from you a couple of days back - I did direct her here, I'll try again.

All for now - tea is nearly ready & eyes are aching - oh boy - what next

Are Bonny's pyjamas pretty or functional? Did she like them because they were new? Keep me up-to-date with how you are doing & 's antics


here's just a bit of for you - not alot mind you

Shirp,

You can kick yourself all you want but it won't do any good. You did more than enough to qualify as a good mother. You could have lived in a castle and still not do any better. If your L were to look back at what you did while she was growing up and see the sacrifices you made so that she could have as good a life as she had there would be no question that you went more than the extra mile (kilometer?). That is unless she thinks she did it all on her own. Hopefully this is not the case.

I don't know any thing about doctoring but 18 pills? How does she do it? Bonnie balks at anything over five pills I can't imagine trying to get her to take 18. Is she telling the doctors how she is feeling after taking the pills? I had a friend that kept getting very tired and got to the point the last time he almost wasn't able to get to the phone after collapsing on the floor. He finally thought it out and realized that the malady was occurring around four hours each time after taking his medicine. He got his meds changed. Maybe she needs to have her medicine re-evaluated.

Out of the blue Bonnie said she wanted a pair of Pajamas. She never wore PJ's before. So I took her out to WalMart and found two pair of very nice looking pajamas. She had one on the other evening and they looked very smart on her. They fit well and she looked very good in them.

I am not sure what prompted her but she asked me when we were supposed to go for our blood tests. I told her this Saturday. We are overdue and if she is willing to go then this is the time to get it done. She usually fights me over this.

Thank you for the . Your doesn't seem to play havoc with my sugar level.

I don't know how you are going to do it but you really, really need to lower your stresses. Even though you are not at fault with the daughter maybe if you were to approach her and let her know you didn't mean to sound negative she will back off her anger. If she gets over the anger maybe things will be less stressful between you.

As for mum, well, that situation has to be more stressful than mine with Bonnie. L should be helping you to cope with this not withstanding being eight months pregnant. The main thing is you need to find a way to reduce your stress. You have a grandchild coming soon and she/he needs you to spoil her/him 'cause that is your job and you can not shirk that job. That has been the greatest experience of my life and you need to experience it as well.

gotta . It is way past my bed time and I need to check my mail yet.


MFL

Shirps,

everything okay?

MFL

Hi Mo

Yep, fine now - I'll email you & explain all. Ooops! still owe you those kitchen piccies What on earth was up to in those photos

That was my three year old grandson, Malique. He will be four Cinco de Mayo and is short for his age. But he climbs just about anywhere and with his terrific upper body strength can go where kids five years of age can not. Last summer I found him on roofs of autos.

He got into the flour bin. I believe he got a little help from his older brothers.

The walked over and saw what happened. He came home and got the camera. I'm guessing he may have staged some of the shots.


MFL

maybe he ought to train as an acrobat? He'd be really good in the Cirque du Soleil - if you ever get a chance to take him to see one of their shows I'm am absolutely sure he'd love it!! http://www.cirquedusoleil.com/CirqueDuSoleil/en/clubcirque/home.htm
We went to see Allegria - have a look - you can see some short clips of the shows.

Piccies emailed - hope there were not too many of them

Hey Shirps,
. I was looking in on the creaky place. Sounds like you had a good visit with the pups. Thngs getting better? I hope so. Only six more days!!!!!!

The girlfriend should make it this coming Tuesday. And he will be going back probably Friday. She had a problem with her tonsils and was on Penicillin and that delayed her coming down sooner.

An FYI - I am doing better. Not out of the woods but see daylight through the leaves.

Got any new shots of the littlest pup? I love piccies. My sister-in-law sends me shots of her grandkids and of course is always taking pics of the midget. I print them out and put them on a personal bulletin board I have at work.

hugs all around. a kiss for Holly.
MoFoLo

Hi Mo

Yes, things have calmed down - the littliest pup has been crying alot & my pup & husband were getting worn down. So she asked me to go and spend a couple of days with her, which I have. I don't know if I was much help, but I was company for her & at least held the babe while they eat their dinner together .

I think my daughter realises now what a lonely life bringing up a baby can be - especially when you don't know anyone in the area that you can see during the day.

Tell you more in an email & send you a more recent picture - she's 6 weeks old already & very strong

I hope the girlfriend gets over her tonsilitis ok - nasty business - if she keeps getting it too much then they might decide to take them out : quick whip 'em out

Tell I hope he has a real good time & to behave himself

Ah, so the leaves are rotting away slowly leaving nice big holes eh?

Holly sends a big sloppy kiss back to you

Love to all