h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

I'm terribly sorry, young squeaker - but I apperar to have mislaid my babel fish. Any chance of a translation (into English preferably - French at a push)

SQUEAK

*takes a piece of paper and writes 'hello and welcome'*

Hello and welcome to you Grim Squeake!

Welcome to the guide!

If you have any questions or just want to chat do drop by my page, just click on my name - I am the Community Editor, so have links to all sorts of places.

Nice to see you her!

Peta

*waves a bony paw at Peta, puts down scythe and scribbles on a little pad attached to its robe with a silver chain
'Thank you Peta - nice community you have here! Don't worry its just a social call.'*

Please do stay a while.

*hands over cheese*

You really ought to go and squeak to Anonymouse - http://www.h2g2.com/U40077

Anonymouse isn't online right now - but is often here, and you might have a lot in common - tails for instance!!

SQUEAKSQUEAK

*scribbles 'thankyou for the cheese and the advice' and hands note to Peta before slicing cheese finely with the tiny scythe and nibbling on it*

so, is cheese the only thing you can eat without otherwise "passing it over" first? i notice, on other conversations you can't eat what is offered except for burnt offerings (sorry, bad pun). but then cheese is the definition of a mouse so it is probably already in your frame of reference? just wondering, haven't much experince with the Grim line of business, but am a physicist so know lots about frames of reference.

sometimes, even the grim squeaker has to be polite!

*scribbles 'Many apologies but one has to keep on the side of the Community Editor'. Attempts to wink but this is difficult without eyelids*

*hands over note*

so you can do that 'funny' two fingers behind their head thing.
which will look funnier with boney fingers

He will have to take his hood down...

*pulls hood down onto nose and wags a bony finger at Sidney*

That could be a good thing or a bad thing depending on the finger being wagged.

I reckon this shadowy figure is after someone..cant wait to see who gets
the finger...

rats have more than one... (finger)

*points a bony finger at Sidney Kidney*

SQUEAK

*a cold wind moans, a mournful bell tolls repeatedly and a couple of tumbleweeds blow through*

*points a skin covered finger back at Grim*

Ahh, tumbleweed, my favourite, I didn't know you cared!!

ha...sid..."it could be youuuuuuuuu"

Well it hasn't been yet, but you just never know?

Who knows, tomorrow I could be dead!!

glad to see a after that statement!