h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

..logged on at 15.20GMT 31/05/2000. You needn't think you can hide forever .

Answer my email then.

I did, to the effect that I will be in the office until 6.00pm GMT tonight.

A very softly worded report on our brutal (Irish slang for totally awful) footballing performance can be found at: [Broken link removed by Moderator], and I may put match reports from this weekends games on my page after the bang-collar day.
Assuming I can still type

And again...27/06/2000

So - just wandering around aimlessly then? If so, check Gordon's email wherein is a message for you (both?)

<>=====uuu=====<

I can't. I don't know his password. He is unable to help me with HTML So I need you to tell me things on Sunday. Since you're having articles accepted in batches, perhapd we could revive childraising

For the benefit of the better half (for she now has internet access) I should point out that this refers to the "20 childraising rules" entry and _nothing_ else.

http://www.h2g2.com/U96742 needs to be woken up, even if you are supposed to let sleeping children lie .

Hasn't he changed his email address? I agree that it would be a good way of cutting the beer consumption and will email tomorrow.I'm going home now before they hoist something higher than a Level 1 typhoon warning - actually I'm going to a place called Le Jardin for someone's birthday drinks Hard life, isn't it?

Ha ha ha......
thank you, for the best laugh I have had today!
{Computers should come with Government Health Warnings...WARNING: If you want to preserve marital harmony, password protect your pc!}

Saw you again at some ungodly hour on Saturday!!

So why are you in today? I thought you'd be bang collarin in Ireland?

You'd think so, wouldn't you.
I'm in because the Belgium project is in dire need of sandbagging to prevent the whole thing falling apart and I did so well on the Poland project .
Not too bad though, as it gives the other half chance to do some shopping...apparently the nest needs new feathers (in this case cushions) Also the weather is such that you can only really go out in the late evenings...

How did belguim come into it?

Hmm - not sure what level of this I can talk about in public, but the general state is that some developers jumped ship leaving the Belgium project in difficulties at about the exact moment I tied the Poland project up to critical acclaim. Unfortunately I've been given this albatros to deal with, my not being a policy side person notwithstanding. Cue long hours and sweaty brows....

You don't have written TACOS?

TACOS only apply where seperate legal entities (i.e. companies) are merged, not between project groups within one company.
Besides - it is in response to my statement that I can od just about anything in this company if I turn my head to it...so we'll have to see if my bluff is officially called...and I'm getting paid £35 an hour for it .

Incidentally - got quite a bubbly email from Gordon. Living in a shared farmhouse, apparently. He doesn't say whether he's sharing with humans however

I've always had these as part of an individual contract, but can quite see that you're not into group negotiations.
That's about three times my salary. Do you think we can persuade the farmer to switch jobs before it's too late?.

I don't think we'd get G to move into software in a hurry, as he's dreaming of the big commision as all salespeople do.

I think its a fairly decent job of work for the money. Not many people could get the message "Command has been aborted" 200 times a day without tearing their (remaining) hair out.

Ah - such is job satisfaction.

I was staring intently at the screen and two people are watching me, and after 10 minutes I put a solitary ' in the code and compile it up. One turns to me and says "we pay you all this to be putting 's in the code" and I said "no, you pay me all this to know where to put the '"
.

That is just fantastic. Now all you need to do is put them in the right places in any written English and you'll pass for educated.