h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

we went into town for dinner on Saturday evening...jumped on the tube at South Ealing – we were going to Piccadilly tube station and then visit some maniac Swede's idea of heaven a place where the temperature is kept at -5degrees and ice is part of the decor...anyway we stopped somewhere between South Ealing and Acton Town (the next stop) after being told a defective train had caused some problems at South Kensington...we then listened as an unfortunate BA steward travelling in our carriage put his lungs on the carriage floor...got to Acton Town and then on to Hammersmith - slowly stopping just before Ravenscourt Park…where we were told the doors would open to allow passengers to get some fresh air...Anne & I got up to get off and I nearly ended up sitting on the BA stewards lap as the train lurched on towards Hammersmith...we did get off there and jumped on a district line train…and got off that at Earls Court after hearing all trains east were cancelled due to maintenance works…we got up to street level hoping to get a cab the rest of the way...we walked towards the Brompton Road and eventually ended up on the Old Brompton Road…bus stops everywhere we passed were full of hopeful people...and continued walking through South Kensington and in the process managing to get lost finally ending up opposite the natural history museum on the Cromwell Road and headed west back towards Gloucester Road tube where my other half announced she could go no further and by which time (one hour later) we had not seen a single free cab...so we entered Gloucester Road tube and descended a narrow spiral staircase (the lift was full) all the way down to the westbound platform and went back to South Ealing – we eventually arrived there two and half hours after leaving...a meal from Maxims and a bottle or two of claret made the night bearable...

so much for the former president of neasden's tfl...