This is the Message Centre for RussH

Joshua story

Post 1

Mbira

Your writing is clear, easy to read, expressive and funny. Your turn of phrase gently mocks our beliefs, or what we might think of as beliefs. There are many phrases to admire ‘fawning white cap that was still hovering around.’ ‘…he misspelled the ‘Place’ and put p.l.a.i.c.e instead of p.l.a.c.e.’ and ‘His halo got knocked out of alignment and it banged on the door frame’. My favourite is ‘…nearly relieved myself into infinity...’
I printed the story out to read because I felt I was missing something on screen. I gather Joshua was in a transitional place after death and before paradise. But it seems to be a paradise entirely on his own terms; he’s very much in control. I wasn’t clear why Joshua was chosen. There is something you seem to be holding back from in the story and I’m not sure what it is. In a way I was waiting for something else to happen, especially because in the beginning you mentioned how powerfully built he was and then there’s the title which made me think he was a new age crusader, someone with a moral crusade about to …
Overall I enjoyed reading the story and will look out for more of your writings. Mb


Joshua story

Post 2

RussH

Hi Mbira

Many thanks for the kind words. I'm glad you enjoyed it. I think it still needs a little polish, but it's nice to know that it's achieving it's aim (to be mildly amusing).

Indeed this is just the 1st chapter of a bigger piece (I'm hopeful the 2nd chapter will be posted here soon - probably in the Extended Works section with the revised 1st chapter) which will (I hope) answer some of the questions you have and flesh out the characters and story a little more.

Thanks again for the feedback Mbira - it's very much appreciated.

Russ


Key: Complain about this post

More Conversations for RussH

Write an Entry

"The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy is a wholly remarkable book. It has been compiled and recompiled many times and under many different editorships. It contains contributions from countless numbers of travellers and researchers."

Write an entry
Read more