h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

Jen woke up and wondered where she was. She directed her eyes to the left and saw Fly still snoring away. Then she looked to the right and saw their things. She checked. Everything was still there. Jen grabbed the walkie-talkie and pressed VOX.
'Jen ehm I mean VENUS for MERCURY'
'I hear you. Been able to rest?'
'Yes, and a good sleep it was. Is it evening yet?'
'No, it's 4PM. Fly there?'
'Yes, and making her presence known by snoring. I bet all bugs have left the room in panic. Look, Rich, this lady, is she to be trusted?'
'Jen, these people were selected very carefully. My late father always said you can't really trust people till you've got hair growing out of the palm of your hand.'
'Huh?'
'Jen, she's 99,9% fine. I think it's fair we give her the benefit of the doubt. Look, I know you're having a hard time right now, but don't forget to reap the fun moments as well.'
'Rich, our enemy - is it just the one person? Surely he - I'm sorry I think 'it''s male - can't operate on his own.'
'Of course not, I think there's a whole nasty army of buggers behind him.'
'Was he also behind the sudden upsurge of crime?'
'Probably. Jen, I've got to leave you know, things to do. Give my love to Fly. Bye. Over'
'Over'

Fly needed another half hour before waking up.
Jen told her about Rich and afterwards they talked a little about their childhood.
KNOCK KNOCK
'Who's there?' asked Fly
'The other persona of Mayoress Goldfish'
'Ah, you can come in then!'
Poisson D'Or opened the door and the little dark place radiated at an instant.
'Come with me, girls,you need a substantial meal'
She led them to a tiny kitchen-like place and ordered them to be seated.
The lady had arranged a nice banquet of ripe fruit, cheese, chicken and salads.
'Hope you had a good rest, girls!'
Jen and Fly assured her they had slept well and she was too kind and then Poisson D'Or said dig in, Jen protested oh no you first, the dancer nodded nonono after you and Fly concluded the deadlock situation by almost devouring a drumstick. The other females followed her example.
'Girls, I am very proud to announce that tonight I'll show the wide range of dances that Poisson D'Or aka myself has mastered. You are both invited.
Because our city is rather small, I've also invited various people from different places.
Fly remarked 'Sounds cool.However, don't you think spectators that arrive later will push other ones at the opposite end out of your great metropolis?'
Jen prodded her in the side.
Poisson D'Or's eyes narrowed.
'Are you mocking the size of Sirtakiville, Catharina?'
'No no, I think it's a great street erm I mean city.'
Jen, seeing this was going wrong, tried to change topic.
'Nice skirt, Poisson D'Or!'
'Thank you,Jennifer. Made it myself. It's also part of an experiment. Unlike other fruits I think bananas grow harder when you talk to them.'
Suddenly Poisson D'Or started to shake and wobble all over.

Quasimodo, the haunchback in charge of the eastern Versailles-replica-gardens, was not exactly a sight for sore eyes. In fact, he was ugly as hell. At the same time, he had a heart of pure gold. Unfortunately he was also mute. The only one who frequented him was Perks. Together they had learnt to communicate with gestures. Other people ignored him or ran away.
This poor man was now taking a walk, admired the flowers but could not help feeling lost. It was Perks' day off and he had no one to talk to.
Despondently he stared at his feet. It struck him that someone had apparently been walking in the flower beds. This was enough to make his blood boil. Determined to catch the culprit, he tried to follow the footprints. They led him towards Perks' territory. He saw the oak and was curious. There was a young sleeping woman. He came closer and wanted to wake her. When he touched her, her head moved.The back of her head was covered with blood. Plenty of it. Quasimodo started looking desperately for a pulse. The girl not responding, Quasimodo ran towards Titicaca Towers, ignored etiquette and ran into the arms of Jeeves.

Meanwhile Lady R. was upstairs studying ant pooh under a microscope. She was distracted by the voice of Jeeves,coming in and more agitated than usual.
'M'lady, Quasimodo is downstairs, something's terribly wrong. He keeps pointing and gesticulating and I can't understand what he wants to say.'
Lady R. rolled her eyes again. 'Jeeves, probably he's seen one of the girls. And I tell you, they think they can mortify me by running away.
Like I care! I have instructions about what to do in the building. If they can't bear my authority, tough. I'm not doing anything to find them. They 'd do anything to vex me!'
'M'lady, I don't think that's it. He's almost frantic'
'YOU go with him then, Jeeves, I don't want anything to do with this idiot'
Jeeves returned downstairs and Quasimodo accompanied him outside, pulling him forward by the sleeve.

TO BE CONTINUED