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To Ivan, the not terribly average!

Post 121

Ivan the Terribly Average

Well, it's been an exhausting couple of days. Nothing in particular; just Life, you know.

Last night's restaurant was Malay/Chinese; the company included the ex-fiancee of my best (straight male) friend, and the man she's going to marry instead, as well as another couple who I don't like at all. The food was good, and it was nice to see S again, even if it is strange to see her with someone else.

As far as food goes, I'll eat anything except mushrooms and seafood, which make me smiley - ill. My preferences would be Thai and Indian, with an honourable mention for Ethiopian (of all things). There's a very good Ethiopian place not far from here. Italian is good too, but it's hard to find well-made Italian food in Canberra. Melbourne's the place for that. When I'm cooking, it's usually something spicy.

smiley - stiffdrink Once I've cleared the backlog on hootoo, I'm going to settle down for some serious relaxing...


To Ivan, the not terribly average!

Post 122

originalBillyBob

Ethopian? It's a wonder they have people who know how to cook with food there is so little of it over there! I like very mild curry with coconut and yoghurt and pineapple. Not the kind that make you sweat or make you feel like the world just fell out of your bottom smiley - blush Salmon was on the menu here tonight.

Youngest and Eldest and I watched the dance revue vid last night and it was great smiley - disco They enjoyed every second they were dancing. We had a good sesh scrutinising everybody's moves and if they missed a beat and we ended up rolling around the floor with laughter as Youngest made a comment about one of the male ballet dancers smiley - headhurts

Is that an open house on the smiley - stiffdrink front? I'm in the mood for doing serious ...... nothing in particular .....

Tomorrow, Youngest is going to a friend's party which involves a 5' chocolate fountain and marshmallows, a ride around town on a private double-decker bus and a sleepover. We are taking a train up the coast to a watch fair. I wish I was 10 again *sigh*


To Ivan, the not terribly average!

Post 123

Ivan the Terribly Average

I don't mind mild curry, but every so often I like a really hot one. What's good is a beef curry, subtly spiced, and finished with finely-chopped spinach and yoghurt. smiley - drool I've got this one down to a fine art.

Here - the smiley - stiffdrink of your choice.

The chocolate fountain has me curious. What does that entail, exactly? Is it made of chocolate, or does it dispense chocolate? Or both? It all sounds gloriously messy, and a lot of fun.

What happens at a watch fair? I have a mental picture of some truly obsessive individuals, talking about springs and cogs and quartz movements...


To Ivan, the not terribly average!

Post 124

originalBillyBob

*gratefully accepts smiley - stiffdrink, sips, closes eyes and for 2 or 3 seconds it's just BB, vodi and coke, ice and lemon and .... back in the real world* Thanks for the drink!

Your beef curry sounds delicious smiley - drool I'm swayed by the yoghurt.

Do you want to see the chocolate fountain? www.chocolatedelight.co.uk should get you there OK. I don't know why that hasn't popped up as a link but check it out and all will be revealed.

As for the watch and clock fair smiley - zzz unless you like that sort of thing. I went along because HotH has more watches than you can shake a stick at (and some of them are real expensive ones, I mean real expensive smiley - yikes) and a huge collection of clocks. I also went because a) it is one of HotH's interests and I went along to show support in his interest and b) if I didn't go then that would have been the best part of day not seeing each other, again! Eldest wasn't impressed at all smiley - sadface but I jollied her along and she was fine with me. No thaw I'm afraid.

Tell me all about your idyllic lazy weekend. Time for another smiley - stiffdrink while we chat?


To Ivan, the not terribly average!

Post 125

originalBillyBob

PS I'm trying to find the website with the double-decker party buses on and you are right about the truly obsessive individuals smiley - headhurts


To Ivan, the not terribly average!

Post 126

Ivan the Terribly Average

The link needs the http:// in front of it to work. I had a look at the site... smiley - drool A friend of mine would like one of these at her wedding I'm sure - I sent her the link. She's a true chocolate fiend. I wonder if there's a local company that offers this.

I think I'll stick with smiley - ale for now - there's been a few this afternoon. It's been a nice quiet weekend - a bit of housew*rk but not too much, a bit of lolling on the couch with DVDs and books, and a lope through the flower show and a trip to the pub this afternoon. I also recklessly bought a boxed set of Marx Brothers films, one of which is playing now. Shortly I'll have to decide what to eat this evening - it'll have to be something delivered as the kitchen's a total mess at the moment and I really can't be bothered doing anything about it.


To Ivan, the not terribly average!

Post 127

originalBillyBob

Oooh, nice weekend smiley - smiley

Your kitchen's a mess. Mine is a planning travesty. When I viewed our home last year, it had so many things in its favour. However, the kitchen, although brand spanking new, was not one of them. Whoever designed it, and I suspect it was blind monkey working for peanuts, couldn't have made more of a hash of it. I have played the long, patient game and finally, HotH has agreed that, indeed, we need to add to the kitchen. So this morning I have a kitchen planner coming to help me re-design the kitchen. I appreciate more money will be spent on moving existing appliances than the cost of the actual kitchen cabinets.


To Ivan, the not terribly average!

Post 128

Ivan the Terribly Average

That does sound like fun.

Sadly, I rent this place and can't change the kitchen layout. There's enough bench space but not enough power points; there's a huge island bench in the middle of the room, but it only allows 14 inches for getting between it and the pantry to get to the sink; the stovetop is gas (yay!) but the oven is electric (boo!)... the list goes on. This place was built before the war, and the kitchen still has the old wood-stove alcove, now converted into a storage space and good deep drawers. It's a pity that the renovations about 10 years ago weren't a little more intelligently done.

There's an episode of Absolutely Fabulous about redesigning a kitchen... smiley - biggrin


To Ivan, the not terribly average!

Post 129

originalBillyBob

I don't remember that episode, sweetie darling smiley - biggrin I remember the one when the kitchen burned down and Patsy rises from the table with a cigarette in her mouth and this clean streak from the top of her beehive to her neck where the fire had raged around her, as she slept on the table top smiley - rofl Classic! I love AbFab! Shower, shower, shower smiley - run >>>>>>>>>>> smiley - towel


To Ivan, the not terribly average!

Post 130

Ivan the Terribly Average

I think it's the episode after that one; there's no kitchen, Eddie's dithering about what she wants in the kitchen and who she should get to design it, and Saffy threatens to do it herself... smiley - biggrin

I should do something about food, probably.


To Ivan, the not terribly average!

Post 131

originalBillyBob

Did you eat in the end? smiley - cake? smiley - flan? Or good old-fashioned smiley - choc and lots of it?

I've had the most horrendous time since your last chat. HotH really put me through the wringer because of a simple misunderstanding and HotH's ego couldn't take it smiley - blue I've cried, had my nose wiped (very attractive smiley - erm) Where does this end for me? To not be frustrated anymore I have to d****** HotH but instead of feeling relief, I feel such sadness. I feel like I've failed after putting in so much love, tenderness, patience, emotional investment! What a whoos smiley - wah


To Ivan, the not terribly average!

Post 132

Ivan the Terribly Average

I ended up not eating - it was all too much trouble.

But that's neither here nor there. You are clearly in need of smiley - choc and smiley - stiffdrink and smiley - cuddlesmiley - hug. And you have not failed - far from it. You have given the situation everything you've got - what else is there? It's time to look after yourself, I'd say. If you can maintain yourself as a separate and confident entity in the current circumstances, then go for it. If the situation means that you're suffering and being diminished as a person, then... no, I won't say it...

At any rate, what I think is irrelevant. Tell me to go boil my head if you like - I won't take offence.

I would like to help however I can, but I'm unsure how to go about it.

If you ever need to vent in a private forum - not this site - there is an email address on my Space. An email sent to that 'dodgy' account will get you my real email address, and my real name for that matter, in return.


To Ivan, the not terribly average!

Post 133

originalBillyBob

Oh Ivan, smiley - brave that was so kind of you. I have had the most awful time since Monday. A simple error of my behalf has been blown out of all proportion by HotH and and I have been left feeling absolutely bl**dy awful since - hence the silence. And now, a weekend break away booked for this weekend suddenly looks like it might not go ahead because HotH hasn't graciously accepted my apology. And even that was a submissive apology to keep things smooth.

I wouldn't tell you to boil your head smiley - yikes Your take on the subject is valuable to me, that's why I bore you with it.

How perceptive of you that smiley - choc and smiley - stiffdrink and smiley - cuddle and smiley - hug were all needed. Thank you.

What is your social diary looking like this week?

I can only offer you smiley - choc, the smiley - stiffdrink has all gone smiley - headhurts


To Ivan, the not terribly average!

Post 134

Ivan the Terribly Average

There's plenty of smiley - stiffdrink here... Vodka and brandy, and probably some vermouth. I'm having smiley - ale to celebrate cleaning (most of) the kitchen.

My social diary is mostly empty for the next week - by choice. There might be drinks after w*rk on Friday, and there's drinks on Saturday night as a few of us watch the election results come in (and hope for the best - a change of government). Apart from that - nothing. I need to do some gardening and things, and there's an entry I started here back in June that needs finishing.

Out-of-line comment: If HotH is prepared to cancel the weekend over some perceived slight or error for which there has been an apology - well, that's just petulant. It's like withholding a treat from a child. You deserve more consideration than that.


To Ivan, the not terribly average!

Post 135

originalBillyBob

You finally cleaned the kitchen smiley - wow I'm impressed. Now you won't eat on purpose because you'll end up at square one again. And, of course, there's now room for another jigsaw.

There isn't any coverage of the election race on the BBC at all. It's all Kerry vs George Dubya. They will obviously cover the winner. I hope it goes your way. Let's drink to a victory now smiley - alesmiley - stiffdrink That way, if you don't get the result you want, we haven't missed out and we can still drown our sorrows on Saturday night or celebrate a win smiley - biggrin

Re: out-of-line comment, which it wasn't at all - because HotH holds the financial purse strings, he would cancel. He has done it once before. If HotH chooses to spend £232 on fares and £160 on two nights in a hotel, and then not turn up, that's his choice, not ours! I could always go on my own I suppose. I dislike this feeling of being punished for this small error on my behalf. My crime: I didn't recognise HotH's voice on the telephone over the background noise from where HotH was phoning from and the printer whizzing away here. Lock me up and throw away the key!! smiley - rofl


To Ivan, the not terribly average!

Post 136

Ivan the Terribly Average

The BBC website at least acknowledges that we have an election going on down here - there's no detailed examination of the issues, but at least they mention it. We need to get rid of our PM - if you think Blair is a US toady, you ain't seen nothing yet... The poison dwarf who's been running Australia (into the ground) for the last few years simply has to go. smiley - steam

I never recognise voices on the phone. If a male voice says 'it's me', I know it's my ex; if a female voice says 'it's me', then it's either my mother or my sister and I have to let them talk for a bit before I can pick up on the speech patterns. I simply cannot pick other people's voices at all. As for background noise - I can't cope with that at the best of times.

If HotH is being a petulant thing and cancelling the weekend, will he stay in the Big Smoke, or pay you another flying visit?


To Ivan, the not terribly average!

Post 137

originalBillyBob

I do at last, thank goodness, feel better again. How can one silly error make such an impact on my life smiley - headhurts Growled, barked and snarled at over stuff is really tiring. Some paperwork arrived concerning the Big Smoke. With anxious butterflies, I rang the mobile and I wasn't cut off this time. Without actually asking 'Are we still going?' I established that we are still going away this Friday.

Everytime an incident like this happens, I always break the ice. I always make the first gesture. And I always apologise (even when it isn't my fault). What happened Monday wasn't even mentioned. It's actually a bit scary that horrible things that happen between us are never mentioned and addressed and therefore I never have closure and never able to move on. My brain feels like I have thousands of hanging threads, waiting to be cut clean off. Instead, they are just flapping in the wind, untidy and uncared for.

Having no fixed abode the last two weeks in the Big Smoke, one might have thought that he would have made that flying visit. I would have put my money on staying in the Big Smoke where HotH has unattached friends, free to play all weekend.

I really want to go away this weekend, it's our wedding anniversary smiley - yikes but I don't want to go with a black cloud hanging over my head. It's also reassuring to know that it was an easy mistake that anybody could have made.

See you for one lunchtime smiley - ale?


To Ivan, the not terribly average!

Post 138

Ivan the Terribly Average

Lunchtime got a bit smiley - weird, but smiley - ale is a good idea right now. Thanks.

How long have you been obliged to be the peacemaker? I suspect you're more resilient than I could ever be.

I understand the feeling of lacking closure. I once had a partner who would never discuss issues, or apologise, or accept responsibility for his actions. After months of mounting pressure, I went home to Mother. To this day, I'm convinced that he doesn't truly understand why I left. We meet rarely, and it's always by accident, but he still tries to get me to go back to him. He has learnt nothing in the intervening 14 years.

My parents had a rule for themselves, to the effect that all disputes were to be resolved by bedtime - even if that meant talking until 4am. I grew up thinking this was normal, and that everyone followed that rule. It was a huge shock when I found myself living with a man who sulked instead.

More smiley - ale?


To Ivan, the not terribly average!

Post 139

originalBillyBob

More smiley - ale? Is the Pope Catholic? I'll have some lime cordial in mine please.

As for being the peacemaker, I've been doing it for years and years and years, my friend. At first I didn't mind doing it because I love him and I just wanted things to get back to normal. But after years of not discussing issues, not apologising or accepting responsibility for his actions, just like one of your former partners, I have just about come to the end. And he will never know why either.

Daddy said I was a saint to put up with him and Mummy said she would have left years ago.

That rule your parents had is a good rule, a normal rule, even the bit about staying up until 4am to get the issue resolved. I too have had a shock to find that HotH is nothing more than a terrible sulker, and he is a grown man in his fifties. I'm not I hasten to add, that is a man or in my fifties. I only entered my forties this year.

The good news of the day is though, for someone who hates shopping, being on the petite side and having been made to feel guilty about money as well in the past, I bought two pairs of cords, a pair of jeans and I long-sleeved t-shirt today. That's the most I've bought for myself in years smiley - smiley

Tea is cooking and I have a bag to pack. I don't feel very excited though. How sad. What will you be doing while I'm in parts foreign?

Gosh, that smiley - ale went down well. I'm in the mood for another smiley - yikes Are you? Or did you have too much at lunch?


To Ivan, the not terribly average!

Post 140

originalBillyBob

Well, the day is here and I want to go but feel apprehensive to say the least. I wonder what you will be doing while I'm not hootooing? Whatever it is I hope it is sprinkled liberally with absolutely nothing in particular and smiley - redwine

Back in a few days then smiley - towelsmiley - hugsmiley - kiss


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