h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

This continues the forum for Abduction Island. No fishing, no swimming, no littering.

What's the ruling on Bovril?

Wow--I don't think you can get that where I live, so I'm afraid I can't lift a cup for ya. (Dang!) Um...is it addictive? If it's addictive it's in.

Sounds really disgusting. *Evil Walt Disney cackle* I say it's in. Sirrah! Get the Vicks 44, I think we have some more stuff to dump it in.

Vicks---ohhhhhh. *shudders with craving*

Alright, so we've got plans for a great waterfront here, and will make lots of money. Did someone say something about a tsunami earlier?

And how much building have we gotten done on our home? We certainly need somewhere to live...and I'm tired of getting sand up my nose.

*Hands Grey a noseclip*
Bovril is addictive. It is the sort of stuff the SAS take on special ops and make themselves cups of it when all other food has run out. It can keep them going where hard drugs would just fail.

Hang on. We haven't yet built any houses, yet we can already score drugs? This is some kind of island!!!

Bovril isn't drugs, silly. Its beef extract that people use to make a sort of tea which really cheers you up when you are cold and miserable. Of course anything that cheers you up leads to you wanting to do more of it so you drink more and more Bovril till your teeth go brown and you get BSE.

Always wnated borwn teeth. It kind of fits in the image I've made myself of how a duke of Dunstable should look...

Moustache poised dramatically over a row of very sturdy brown teeth?

And BSE.

*Evil Cackle, just for good measure*

What's BSE?

Ah, nice to be lying around on an island. I have a feeling I should be doing something now, something that requires me making money.

I know what Bonox/Bovril tastes like, not bad, but not very good idea. Maybe we could promote it as a part of the Garibaldi's Drinks? Or has Evil Walt go his/her hands on it

*starts up his own franchise of Garibaldi's Drinks*

Ok, our motto is, "Where we know what you drink" Our first product on the market is a cheap and nasty version of Bovril, but you will be more than happy to pay twice as much, since it comes from Garbaldi's Drinks.

Quite so. And a bald head, bulging eyes, and a temper that could make american wrestlers look like sunday school kiddies.

I think BSE is one of those diseases that cows get. Maybe the one that has stopped UK from exporting any beef for the last three years.

*puts stethoscope round kneck, puts hands behind back and walks back and forth*
BSE - Bovine Spongiform Encephalopathy. Commonly known as Mad Cow Disease.
It causes the brain to go spongey.
Known as CJD when it manifests itself in human beings (Creutsfeld Jacob Disease). Extremely nasty.

Caused by cows being fed the minced brains and backbones of sheep and other things in their cow cake.
*takes off stethoscope*

Ah.... um.... okay.... while I'm here Vestboy, I've got these pains in the diodes all down my left side.....

Remove all of your clothes and insert this daffodil where the sun doesn't shine.