h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

yer pants are on fnord!

meet the president at the grassy knoll... wait, been done...

eat the presidents greasy knob... nope, that's been done too.

how about we .... beat.... the ......um.... furby's .... furry,.... nose?

i would prefer to squeeze the slurpy thru my toes

Bite-ing th-e Mice-es to piec-es? Corn-ing C-on on Februra-ry 18?

Biting mice is not sanitary, and there are unorthodox dogmatic prescriptions for illnesses such as this. I suggest you sign up with your local Catholics for Kali immediately.

Ok, so the biting of mice is right out. What can we bite?.... Wait, never mind... I just answered my own question,... what if we.... site the "Local Police Departments" for having a "Revolution" on the "TV Preachers" aided by the "Saturday Morning Cartoons", "NASA", "Texas", and the "Campus Crusade for Cthulhu", while "The Wierd Turn Pro".

This time of year it is most appropriate to run rampantly nude thru the woods - p'raps biting when necessary, as long as it is consensual (an it harm none, pal) ~ and I say we nuke the conspiracy illusion, create a new rabid reality which replicates itself in a fractal conscious manner - refracting its brilliance thereby increasing the motion towards manifest destiny. Let's obliterate TV's - it will send millions of Amerikkkans into apoplectic fits of delirium, better than dosing the water tower! Culture Jamming and the fostering of fnords are in high order -

Cool.