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A confusing line in your book?
Menthol Penguin - Currently revising/editing my book Started conversation Jun 11, 2014
Forgive me if this is just me being a numpty, but I found the sentence below really confusing.
"So up rode this puny little man, ready wrapped to bake, and demanded that either Corfredun, that was his name, demanded that either Fred killed himself for his crimes and sins, or this little man would do it."
Shouldn't it read more like?
"So up rode this puny little man, ready wrapped to bake, and demanded that either Corfredun, that was his name, kill himself for his crimes and sins, or he would do it."
This is in the printed copy btw, not checked the e-book version.
A confusing line in your book?
Pastey Posted Jun 11, 2014
I tend to write with a "heavy voice", if you imagine an old man "saying" it, it makes more sense 
A confusing line in your book?
Menthol Penguin - Currently revising/editing my book Posted Jun 11, 2014
Ahhh, gotcha. I see how you could read it now. Cheers!
A confusing line in your book?
Pastey Posted Jun 11, 2014
Yeah, the first chapter (I think that's in the first chapter) really should have been called "Prologue", the book changes a bit after that. And that bit's the old dragon remembering things
A confusing line in your book?
Menthol Penguin - Currently revising/editing my book Posted Jun 11, 2014
Well I'm loving it so far, a welcome break from me trying to plod through the GoT series (they get a bit, well, dull after so long).
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A confusing line in your book?
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