h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

Yep, when they made you they broke the momold.

everyone else pales to your momoness

Are you sure they don't darken?

sullied, yes. darkened? i don't know...

Lay down sully.

the truth is out there

No, the truth is in my cupboard next to the ramekins.

all i see are monkey plates

I let monkey leave his plates here. We had a pie party. You weren't invited.

no, that was a pity party

Isn't it a pity?
Isn't it a shame?
That there's no pie for you,
and no one to blame.

i made blueberry pie on sunday and there's still 3/4ths of it left

Let me at it.

it's a shame,
it's a pity,
no pie for the old biddy

I wish you'd stop calling Dame Judi that.

that's what she gets for snubbing me in her acceptance speech

Face it. You'll only ever be Mediocre Boy.

Mediocre Boy®? sounds like one of your dates

I only have figs, Uncle Harold.

i always suspected figs were a little harold