h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

Just toss one in, having to do with a favorite cat, a Manx I was once acquainted with called "Pirate" on account of his decidedly piratical air. When taken for his first outing in the garden, still a kitten small enough to hold in the palm of the hand, he terrified everyone by diving down a gopher hole, exciting fears he might never be seen again. He came back after a time, dragging a gopher* bigger than he was. He grew quickly, maturing exceptionally broad of beam (wide shouldered) and wasn't able to continue invading gopher holes very long, but it did get him off to a good start in life.

*Gopher: Southern California lemming.

Lemming: Alaskan pocket gopher.

Burrowing rodent typically an 3 to 4 inches in length mature, notable for an uncanny sense of when the melons are setting fruit evidenced by its habit of sucking the vines down like a strand of spaghetti. As a matter of fact I've seen them pull whole fruit trees into the ground.

"...incurable optimism..."

My own thing is a chronic dysthymia, much in the spirit of the dysthymic robot from the h2g2 movie. Username: ITIWBS U10713001

I

T hought

I t

W ould

B e

S o

Acronym for the first thought that came to mind when I found that my first choice for a username had already been taken.

Hi there ITIWBS,i informed my two pirates about your kitten and the gopher saga.They both hung their heads in shame.Edward Teach has never caught anything in his life,unless you count a cold and an expensive vets bill,Capt.Henry Morgan once caught a frog and nearly died of shock when it let out a piercing scream,he has caught nothing since.
My user name and my eternal optimism are linked,not because i am into pornography,but because i support Chelsea Football Club and have done so since an alien force took over my brain in 1962.I have tried to give up this silly nonsense but have been informed there is no cure. I can be seen on match days,dressed totally in blue and shouting " COME ON YOU BLUES!!" My daughter tells people i suffer from Touretts Syndrome and the cats ignore me.

Tourette! Colorful clothing! A chronically ebullient good nature! Occasional florid language!

I'm still more like the dysthymic robot from the h2g2 movie myself, but I like variety.