h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

I hope I am not going to make a fool of myself with this review. I usually either miss the point completely or read too much into it ... but I saw it as a comment on religion and humanity, and if so, this is one of the most original pieces I have seen on the site, Whatever - I thought it was a really witty piece and hang the inflection bit, I thought the dialogue was spot on 10/10.

You might need to re-write the first paragraph, which needs a hook. You could try going head on for the rambling action, rather than describe the room (after all it doesn't exactly have a large part to play in the story)

Alternative title? Wolf In Shepherd's Clothing........

Thanks for your comments. I have indeed altered the first paragraph! Your interpretation was what I'd intended. However, when I wrote this, I was thinking more about secular leaders. Thanks again. M.

Hi Mike

You said "I was thinking more about secular leaders" - it dawned on me this morning that that was what you meant - I got mislead by "The Good Shepherd" bit. I'm slow, but I get there in the end!
Good luck with the story

Barb