h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

Well it could have been letf in the post-office.

It couldn't have waited in the post office all that time. It would have got some very funny looks and might have had to talk to people. Anyway, it was perfectly happy sitting on the bench reading its book.

I seem to have misplaced it, do you think you could get me another one?

Certainly. Wrapped in navy blue this time perhaps?

Yes please. After all, I did get you those earrings.

Thankyou
But it'll be at least eight weeks before I can wear them

That's ok, I got you something else as well

Oooh! Presents! I like presents
I buyed you two presents as well...

Bought, dear. Bought.

Buyed. I'm the linguist and I say it's buyed. Don't argue or you won't get your presents at all

As a student of English I cannot in all conscience allow you to write such drivel.

Comme étudiante de Francais, Anglais et (ancienne) Galloise, je suis plus qualifié que toi d'écrire exactement ce que je veux.
La langue est un outil de communication et si tu comprends ce que j'ai dit, les exacts mots usés ne signifient rien.

C'est un argument stupide. La clarté est importante en travaillant avec la langue.

Clarité.
Le nom "argument" est masculin, dont tu n'as pas besoin de l"e" au but de "stupide".

La clarité, comme j'ai deja dit, n'est pas tellement affectée par les mots exacts usés. C'est la *sentiment* qui est la plus importante, et si tu la comprends c'est bien - les lettres, mots etc. ne font rien!

Tell it to the babelfish.

That's for you to do. I understand it as it is.
I'll be back in a minute, I've just got to go and get my attendance mark.

Is that the thing Nicki doesn't seem to have done?

No, she hasn't. She went home to feed the dog today, but that's not always her excuse. Sometimes she goes to Keith's, or for a "driving lesson", or to the doctor or dentist or optician or for an "appointment with her grandparents" (read "lunch with grandparents"). She's awful. But somehow she never gets in trouble. If I did that they'd catch me straight off.

I expect she flashes a bit of thigh or something.

You think that'd work? This is Nicki, remember
Anyway, I could do that and they'd let me off forever, no problem