Journal Entries
Courtesy
Posted May 1, 2005
N went out with his mates yesterday. Said he'd be back at 6pm. Wasn't home at 7pm so i called to ask if he's be home for dinner. He was in a restaurant eating with his mates. Just asked him to call in future to let me know - asked if he's be late. No won't be late - well I said - can you call me if you're gonna be late - OK he says. At midnight i called to say i'm off to bed - and BTW thanks for my courtesy call to say you'd be late. Sorry he said - clearly not - well i said - you'd expect me to do the same and be pissed off if i didn't so just show me the same courtesy you'd expect. So in he staggers at 6am this morning - dirty shoes on the carpet - banging doors - throwing off his clothes - can't speak he's so drunk - and now still in bed sleeping it off. So much for a nice week end together - havn't seen him since Thursday! Am i too hard - do i expect too much? It feels very one sided - he doesn't do any house work, doesn't clean up unless i ask him to. Never cooks me a meal - never gives me flowers - never says i love you - but cracks up when i threaten to leave. Won't compromise, but has the cheekiest smile and makes me laugh no end. Is my best friend and tells me so. If protective and free at the same time. Am i so insecure that i need all the reassurance - shouldn't it just be enough that we're together? Journal rantings....
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Latest reply: May 1, 2005
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