h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

I read last night that the early sexologist Havelock Ellis wrote about sewing factory workers who could bring themselves to orgasm by sitting on the edge of their seat while treadling furiously.

There's a thought to go with your flannel jimjams.

Just oil the belt before you use it - not on the inside, don't want it too slippery

And here I was thinking the only advantage to treadling furiously would be (hopefully) toning up my leg muscles.

Thanks for the tip, Mala. I wasn't sure if I could oil it or not, as it's perfectly round. Perhaps some of the stuff I bought to wax my old Doc Martens might work?

Personally, I'd use saddle soap, but then, I have the stuff lying around.

Try something like vaseline or baby oil, I think it would soak in better than wax.

Saddle soap...baby oil...vaseline... What are we doing with this belt?

Ah, I get it. You don't want any chaffage to interfere with your furious treadling.

I think baby oil would be better, and then let it soak in before taking the excess off. You don't want to get the wheels greasy.

This Dr Martens stuff is similar to Vaseline. I don't have Vaseline or baby oil around but I am sure I have something similar- I think I have some mineral oil I used to use on my electric shaver before it broke down. If not, I do have a bottle of jojoba oil- I'll give that a try. Good suggestions, thank you all!

Edward, you're a very naughty bonobo.

Speaking of electric shavers...Jo Brand on QI last night:

'It was good when Margaret Thatcher became Lady Thatcher because it sounds like a device for removing pubic hair.'

(vendetta? what vendetta? )

We tried getting the belt on last night, but it was hard getting enough slack out and then poking a hole for the other end of the staple that holds it together. We'll have to pick up some sort of awl, or maybe I'll get a little belt puncher at the store.

Do you have a pocket knife with a little awl thing on it?

I hadn't thought of that- and what a brilliant idea! We checked and the pocketknife doesn't have an awl on it. But gosh, what a good idea that was.

(and we just noticed that the pocketknife does have a fairly elaborate magnetic screwdriver with more bits than my regular magnetic screwdriver has).

We have a tool kit in the car I got from a vendor for Xmas one year, and I'll check that. It has wire strippers, jumper cables, wire terminals, and a nice socket set. Surely something in there has a little point on it.

Otherwise it would be completely pointless.

Uh huh. I may just use a nail.

So, I've been to the sewing shop and got my oil, a spare belt, some bobbins, and some more thread. We'll have another go at this belt later today or tomorrow sometime.

I guess you have to get the slack out by moving parts of the machine? Like a bicycle chain or something.

Yeah, I think so- and I think I underestimated a bit how tight it ought to be. Once K gets up we'll give it another go. I don't want to make a bunch of noise when he's sleeping, or he'll wake up thinking he's in trouble for not helping.

I seem to remember there's usually a bit that you loosen, and it goes 'clunk' and then you can get the belt on.

Yeah, it also loosens the belt so you can lift the machine out (it was forgetting to do that which broke the belt to begin with).

(On an unrelated topic, but something we'd discussed previously, I was reading through some threads on Ask and I see mention of construction crews and thought I'd mention that there's a building going up across the street from my office building, and all summer long there were men putting girders up, and several of my female co-workers and I would sit with our faces pressed against one of my windows, watching a couple of them work. Sometimes with binoculars. )